Patrick's wife Phyllis wanted to help Patrick be less literal minded, so she decided to present him with a scenario. "You're alone in the desert with a lamp that you've rubbed that produced a genie who said he'd grant you three wishes". Patrick didn't even have to think before responding...

"No I'm not".

I just took three grams

Looks like Myrtle, Edna, and Phyllis won't be making it to Thanksgiving this year.

Old ladies' knickers

Roses are red

Violets are blue

Phyllis's are green.

It was really hard spending Christmas with my estranged family in Mexico.

I don’t think anyone cared I was there. The whole time they kept looking for this lady, Phyllis, and her Navy Dad.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Did you hear about the sex addicted homeowner who hired a knighted female to renovate his house?

He contracted Sir Phyllis

Every Day in Florida

Two elderly ladies, Phyllis and Marge, were driving to a church gathering. Phyllis was behind the wheel while Marge rode shotgun, knitting. Out of the corner of her eye, Marge thought she saw a stop sign flash by and asked herself if perhaps Phyllis had blown past it, so she paid attention as they a...

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