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Gneiss Jokes

Why do geologists make such good friends?

Because they’re gneiss

A few years ago I started a journal of different rocks I've found in the wilderness. For a while I was stuck with 68 entries, until I finally found number 69...

**Gneiss!**

I had a stone that I thought was something else, but a geologist friend told me it was gneiss.

I'm afraid i took it for granite.

I was trying to write a joke about rocks.

But no matter how much I worked on it, the set up was a bunch of schist and the punchline wasn't gneiss.

Why does everyone love The Rock?

Because he is so gneiss.

A Geologist from Alabama could tell you the chronological order of Sandstone Layers, but not their exact ages

You could see they're into Relative Dating.

...

*Sigh*

I know you expected that punchline. My apologies, when I'm under pressure my sediment jokes turn a little schist.

Please stay gneiss in the comments.

Some people hate geology jokes,

but I think they're pretty gneiss.

What rock is a 6.9 on the Mohs Hardness Scale?

Gneiss

If the Rock had a brother and that brother had a daughter, what would that make her?

His gneiss.

A rock walks into a bar

The bartender tells him "we don't serve your kind here"

So the rock says: "Why not? I'm a gneiss guy!"

A high schooler told his geology teacher that..

"geology rocks!"

The teacher's response?

"that's Gneiss, but it's too bad you're so schist at it"

#\#rokt

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I just got out of my Geology class.

We studied metamorphic rocks which was Gneiss.

Did you know that Santa Claus is both an arborist and a geologist?

He's gonna find out what's knotty or gneiss.

Welcome to the Geology Department

Have a gneiss day!

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