Why don’t people from Alabama have family trees?

Because it’s just one long branch.

Why are family trees not used in alabama

Because they end up being more like a family tumbleweed.

I dont have a family tree.

Its more like a family cactus,
Cause they’re all pricks.

What do you call a family tree in Alabama?

A family wreath.

Just looked into my family tree and found out both great great grand parents are related...

It's not every day you get to learn about your incestors

I’ve been doing some research into my family tree, and it turns out my Great Grandfather was a terrible dictator.

Apparently none of his secretaries understood a word he said.

Yoda's been tracing his family tree.

It's an evergreen.

My family tree includes Winnie the Pooh, Yogi, Paddington and Baloo.

They're my forebears.

Disappointed by my family tree

Turns out it is a cactus, there's a prick on every branch.

A kid from Alabama had to do a project on his family tree

He brought a ladder to school the next day

Nicki Minaj researched her family tree and discovered she was part American Indian.

The tribe: Arapahoe.

I told my Kentucky raised girlfriend her family tree doesn't fork...

...it spoons.


She did not find it humorous

Southern family trees are like palm trees...

No branches and the family members are fronds with benefits

I was researching the Jackson family tree.

I got back as far as the civil war and then I hit a stone wall.

What website do southerns use to research their family tree?

Incestry.com

What's the difference between a genealogist and a gynecologist?

A genealogist looks up the family tree.

A gynecologist looks up the family bush.

Canada is a logging nation.

Maple trees, spruce tress, and indigenous family trees.

What makes certain plants scientifically related to each other?

The family tree.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

"You don't know Jack Schitt!"

Jack is the only son of O. Schitt and Awe Schitt. O. Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married Awe Schitt, the owner of Kneedeep N. Schitt, Inc.

In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt, and the deeply religious couple produced six children: Holie Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Giva Schitt, Bull Schitt a...

If our last names came from the jobs of our ancestors...

Then I feel really bad for the boys of the "Dickinson" family tree.

Apparently Trump's family tree looks like a cactus

Everybody on it is a prick

A man goes to the Christmas Tree Store

A man goes to the Christmas Tree Store to pick out the perfect family tree. He finds the best one in the store and says to the salesman

‘I’ll take this one!’

‘Excellent choice!’ says the salesman, ‘are you going to put it up yourself?’

‘Yuck, no!’ explains the man, ‘I’m putting...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I got a bunch of laughs taffy’s on Saturday and thought I’d share

Q: Who was responsible for the lakes disarray

A: The loch mess monster

Q:Why did the girl have a tiny wooden infant

A: She wanted a whittle baby

Q: What type of data has a big bite

A: megabyte

Q: What can you catch but not throw

A: A cold

Q: Wh...

Yo momma so fat..

She broke the branch in her family tree!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Did you hear about the ranger?

Once, there was a ranger who took care of the local parkland. Everybody liked the guy, and he was dedicated to his job - stopping people from shooting the deer in the park, maintaining fences and gates, that kind of thing. He was really good at it, too. During the time the ranger served there, no an...

You know, Dwayne Johnson was always a special kid...

In third grade, all the other kids drew a family tree. Little dwayne made a family quarry.

You might be a redneck if...

1. You don't know the difference between your lawn and your driveway.
2. Watching Jerry Springer reminds you of your neighbors
3. Your family tree is a circle

It just all depends on how you look at some things...

Judy Wallman, a professional genealogy researcher in southern California , was doing some personal work on her own family tree. She discovered that Congressman Harry Reid's great-great uncle, Remus Reid, was hanged for horse stealing and train robbery in Montana in 1889. Both Judy and Harry Reid ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Les Mis Joke (from r/Lesmiserables Joke by u/shepy66

Ok, so there were these two guys at a high school, a really weird, lame, goth kid from France, and a really popular rich kid named John. Nobody actually new the French kid's name, but he was strange enough for people to make up their own. Creep, Emo, Lame-ass, Weirdo, and plenty of other (and much w...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

So I recently discovered there's a black man in my family tree...

he's still hanging there.

Long Lost Twins

There's this story on CNN running about these two long lost twins that found each other on Google!

Did ya hear about it?

The one guy down in Mexico, I think, was doing that family tree thing and found out that he had a twin, Ehmal, was taken as a baby with his mother back to the midd...

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