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Deere Jokes

Redneck Divorce

A hillbilly walked into an attorney's office wanting to file for divorce.

Attorney: "May I help you?"

Hillbilly: "Yea, I want to get one of those dayvorces".

Attorney: "Well do you have any grounds?"

Hillbilly: "Yea, I got about a hundred acres."

Attorney: "No, you...

Smart Robot

A guy goes into a bar, there's a robot bartender. The robot says, "What will you have?"
The guy says, "Martini."
The robot brings back the best martini ever and says to the man, "What's your IQ?"
The guy says, "168."
The robot then proceeds to talk about physics, space exploration, and m...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Hillbilly Stripper

Cletus is passing by Billy Bob's hay barn one day when, through a gap in the door, he sees Billy Bob doing a slow and sensual striptease in front of an old John Deere tractor.

He performs a slow pirouette, and gently slides off first the right strap of his overalls, followed by the left. He t...

Have you heard about the GF that left her BF for a tractor salesman?

BF received a John Deere letter.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Farmer Dave

Farmer Dave went to see his neighbor Dan one day and when he pulled up he was was suprised to not see Dan out in the field working.

So he looked around a bit and found Dan in the barn with some Rr&B playing and a candlelit dinner set out by the John Deere.

Dave asked what was going...

Did you know that John Deere has a sister company that no one knows?

Jane Doe

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An Arab and a Jew

There was an Arab oil Sheikh that was in a coma and needed a blood transfusion to survive. Being AB+ it was hard for him to get a donor with the same rare blood type. Finally they found an old Jewish farmer that was listed as a blood donor with the same blood type. However he was very reluctant to g...

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