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Best Interests Jokes

The World Health Organization has your best interests in mind....

WHO cares

If anyone says you have to work 365 days in 2020 in order to succeed, they don’t have your best interests in mind and is preaching toxic hustle culture

You need to work 366 days cause it’s a leap year

Did you hear about the honest, trustworthy politician that recently had his constituents best interests in mind?

Me neither.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Crafty Bastard

A man find a lantern lying on the Beach, he rubs it a Genie pops out and says "I can grant you one wish"

The man says "I want to live forever"

Genie replies "we can't grant that wish"

The man's says "I want to live until every politician on the planet, does what's in their const...

There are 2 types of people in this world....

1) People who think the government is looking out for their best interests.

2) People who think.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The therapist told me that I need to work on my trust issues,

But I don't think he has my best interests in mind.

***2020 CANCELLED***

After careful consideration, we have decided that it is no longer in the best interests of everyone involved to proceed with 2020.

While we recognize that a lot of hard work has gone into preparing for 2020, if we're honest it has just turned into a bit of a sh*tshow and we feel it best just ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I met a magical fairy yesterday who said she would grant me one wish.

“I wish to live forever,” I said.

“Sorry,” said the fairy, “I’m not allowed to grant that particular wish.”

“Fine,” I said. “Then I want to die the day after Congress is filled with honest, hard-working, bipartisan men and women who act only in the people’s best interests!”

“You...

Have you heard about Terry the tractor lover?

He was the ultimate tractor enthusiast, his bedroom was plastered with tractor posters, his bed was adorned with a tractor bed spread, tractor toys littered the floor and tractor maintenance DVDs dominated his shelves.

Shortly after Terry's 18th birthday (where he of course had a tractor bir...

There once was a man named Ulf, and he was the meanest Viking in all the land.

Time after time he proved his temperament, and so obnoxious was he that the world knew him as Rude Ulf.

Despite his prowess, the village soon found him unbearable, and even his mother had not a kind thing to say.

Amidst pleas and cries for Rude Ulf’s exile, the chief gave him an ultima...

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