UPJOKE
diminutivepatronymicforenamesurnamenamelesstadchildfergusmaeveurquharthaddendeanejenniedownesannabel

Bertie Jokes

Bob & Bertie

Bob & Bertie charter a pilot to fly them moose hunting. They shoot 6 of the beasts.
As Bob starts loading, the pilot says, "Sorry, my plane can only take 4 moose."
The lads object. "Last year we shot 6, and the pilot loaded them all; and he had the same plane as yours."
Reluct...

Bertie, Bessie, the Company, its Lawyer, and the Judge

A farmer named Bertie had a car accident. He was hit by a truck owned by the Eversweet Company. In court, the Eversweet Company's hot-shot solicitor was questioning Bertie.

'Didn't you say to the police at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine?' asked the solicitor.

Bertie responded: 'W...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Bertie Bott's Every Flavour Lollies

Harry Potter, Ron, and Hermione stop into Bertie Bott's shop one day. Bertie says, "I've been working on a new product called Every Flavour Lollies and I'm giving out free samples. And they have an extra surprise feature. Which flavour would you like to try?"

Ron gets a big smile and says, ...

[NSFW] Mr Cadbury met Miss Rowntree on a Double Decker.

It was just After Eight.

They got off at Quality Street.

He asked her name. ‘Polo, I’m the one with the hole’ she said with a Wispa.

‘I’m Marathon, the one with the nuts’ he replied.

He touched her Cream Eggs, which was a Kinder Surprise for her.

Then he slipped hi...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.