Have you heard about the man who invented a bell-less belfry?

The invention was so great, he won a no-bell prize.

One day, a group of friars decides to open a flower shop as a way to raise money for their belfry.

Because they are men of God and pillars of the community, the locals start to buy all of their flowers from them. This draws the anger of another local florist, who sees the holy men as having an unfair advantage due to their association with the church.
After making countless attempts to put p...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Catholic priest is sitting inside the church, when a guy comes in and asks to be confessed. “Very well, my child,” says the priest, as he leads the man into the confession booth, “Tell me about your sins"

“Well, Father,” says the guy, “On Monday, I was at my girlfriend’s house, and, well… the two of us alone, the house empty… I sinned, Father.”
“Don’t worry, child,” says the priest, “It’s perfectly normal to have such desires and share them with your partner.Nothing serious, just say two prayer...

Two friars were behind on their belfry payments.

So they opened up a small florist shop to raise funds. Since everyone liked to buy flowers from the men of God, a rival florist across town thought the competition was unfair. He asked the good fathers to close down, but they politely declined, He went back and begged the friars to close. They ayet...

Two friars are having trouble paying off the belfry...

So they open a florist shop. Everyone wants to buy flowers from the men of God, who seem to really have a way with their flowers, so business is quickly booming!

The florist across town sees a huge drop in sales and asks the two friars to close their shop, but they refuse.

A month late...

A church puts an ad in the newspaper for a person to ring the bell in the belfry on Sunday mornings.

No one applies for the position except for a young man with no arms.

The church administrator isn’t sure he can handle the job, but the man climbs the tower and rings the bell using just his head. On his first Sunday on the job, the man gets a little too excited and hits the bell a little to...

Church Bell Ringer

A man died after a long career as the local church bell ringer. The priest, looking for a replacement put out word far and wide but received only one applicant, a man with no arms. Initially the priest was hesitant but the man assured him he could do it. He ran up into the belfry, put his head int...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two paramedics in an ambulance were called to a church early one Sunday morning.

After arriving they speak to the pastor and he takes them to the belfry. On the floor of the belfry is an armless, legless man unconscious on the floor.

The first paramedic asks the pastor what happened. “This is our bell ringer.”

The first paramedic asks how he can do the job withou...

There once was a man with no arms. [Long]

Despite this fact, when the town church was looking for a new bell toller, he went straight to the church. The pastor didn't believe the man when told he could do the job, but decided to humor him, saying "If you can ring the bell, the job is yours."

Excitedly, the man climbed the stairs to t...

In honor of the Notre Dame fire, here is the only Notre Dame joke I know...

Notre Dame is looking for a new bell ringer, so they put out a help wanted ad in the local paper.

After a few days a man with no arms shows up and inquires about the job.

At first the priest tries to let him down politely when the man insists that they bring him up to the tower s...

Long ago, there was a cathedral...

The old bell ringer had passed away and the bishop set out a sign announcing that the position was now open for new applicants. A few weeks go by without any bites, but one day a man comes in. The man had a hunched back and no arms, so the bishop was leary of his ability to perform the job, but t...

A man with no arms is in need of a job...

He lacks experience in the service industry but his missing arms severely limit his ability to perform manual labour. Everyday he goes out looking for work and everyday he comes back dejected.

One morning—while flipping through the classifieds with his toes—he comes across the following ad,...

A double joke

Following the death of Quasimodo. the Bishop of the Cathedral Church of Notre Dame sent word throughout the streets of Paris that a new bellringer would need to be appointed. The Bishop decided that he would himself conduct the interviews, and went up into the belfry to interview the candidates. Aft...

The Cathedral of San Giovanni

The City-State of San Giovanni is largely forgotten today. In 1571, however, it was a wonderful place to be for both the secular and the spiritual. The was no war for three centuries, the market benefited from its close proximity to the Old Salt Route, and the artist community was vibrant and influe...

Quasimodo's had it.

Sixty years climbing the steps. Sixty years ringing the bell. He's ready to retire, get a little house in the country for him and the little lady. Puts an ad on Craigslist "Bell ringer wanted. Inquire Quasimodo, Notre Dame."

Next day, there's a knock at the door. Quasi opens it, looks ou...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

For whom the bell tolls

Once upon a time there was a village church who's bell ringer had suddenly passed away. The Preacher put a notice needing a new bell ringer, in the village square. A day or so later, an *arm less* man shows up about the job. The Preacher, not wanting to be unkind, but concerned nonetheless, asked ho...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.