1950's Jokes

A young couple got married and the wife couldn't cook. But they were still in the honeymoon phase, so the first night after they got home, the husband comes home from work and the wife says "I'm sorry I burned dinner." So the husband says "That's all right honey let's just make love."

The... read more

A conference is a group of men who individually can do nothing, but as a group can meet and decide that nothing can be done.

A statistician is a man who draws a mathematically precise line from an unwarranted assumption to a foregone conclusion.

A professor is a man whose job it is to ... read more

Nasser wanted to know the age of a ancient statue that had been recently excavated. He went up to his KGB advisers and asked if their technicians could help. Just a few hours later, one of the KGB men told Nasser "The statue is just about 5,000 years old." Nasser was very impressed and asked "How di... read more

In the 80's, a man walks into a drugstore and states loudly, "I'd like some condoms," and then, leaning over the counter, whispers, "and some cigarettes."

They started passing one dollar bills to the blind man and he could tell that they were one dollar bills.

Then someone gave him a five, which he knew immediately was a five dollar bill.

Then they handed him a ten, and he still knew what it was.

Then they alternated the one, five... read more

Being his natural self, he brought his ol' trusty gun with him.
Saint Peter greets him and says:
"You cannot enter heaven with a gun, my son"

Obviously ol' Joe is pretty upset and walks in circles trying to figure out what to do and actually manages to catch a glimpse through the gate... read more

A young couple about to be married were looking over a house in the country. After satisfying themselves that it was suitable they started for home. During the return journey the young lady was seemingly absorbed in deep thought, and being asked the reason of her silence, she asked the question: ... read more

A 1950's psych ward

I like the girls who do, I like the girls who don't, I

like the girls who say they will, And then decide they won't.

But the girls I like the most of all, And I know you'll think I'm right,

Are the girls that say they never will, But look as though they might!


... read more

Back in the 1950's a Catholic neighbourhood was settling down to eat their Friday night fish when they smelled a delicious steak wafting from the recently-purchased house nearby. The men of the neighbourhood looked and saw their new neighbour having a BBQ. They looked at their fish but remained stoi... read more