Several years ago, Andy was sentenced to prison. During his stay, he got along well with the guards and all his fellow inmates. The warden saw that deep down, Andy was a good person and made arrangements for Andy to learn a trade while doing his time.

After three years, Andy was recognized as one of the best carpenters in the local area.

Often he would be given a weekend pass to do odd jobs for the citizens of the community and he always reported back to prison before Sunday night was over.

The warden was thinking of remodeling his ...

My doctor said I lacked an imagination

I couldn’t believe it

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My girlfriend said our sex lacked passion.

But I actually cried while watching that news report

I lacked confidence in my ability as a sheep shearer....until I started shearing female sheep....

Ewes make me feel like a natural woolman....

My boss said I "lacked courage" so I walked out...

Got a coffee to calm down and returned to my desk.

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A man wanted to become a rich and famous painter...

But he lacked the skills. So the Devil came to him and said "I will make you a world class painter, you'll be rich and famous. In exchange, I want your soul." The painter agreed, and Lucifer snapped his fingers. A set of brushes appeared, which Satan quickly possessed. After being possessed by Satan...

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A Gorgeous Redhead

A man is dining in a fancy restaurant, and there is a gorgeous redhead sitting at the next table.

He had been checking her out since he sat down, but lacked the nerve to talk with her.

Suddenly she sneezes and her glass eye comes flying out of its socket towards the man. He reflexivel...

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The great detective Herlock Sholmes was hired to investigate the disappearance of one of the most important political figures in the nation.

He was quickly briefed on the current situation: at two in the morning, a young woman named Andrea had been captured by an unknown party. Now normally, a kidnapping wouldn’t be something to call in the great Herlock Sholmes for, but Andrea was a special case.

In the nation of Modgasia, the go...

An aging farmer decided it was time for his youngest son to start pulling his weight around the farm.

His older, strong-armed and favoured son, Basil worked hard every day, getting up extra early every morning to milk the cow before dutifully doing the rest of his chores.

The farmers delicious milk became very popular around the area with neighbours often walking miles in for a glass and some...

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I was bit in the ass by an alligator just the other day.

Last month, I sat on a hot grill.
In June I fell through me toilet and got wet.
In January, I accidentally sat on my laptop and broke it.
I really should have looked where I was going.
This being said, I guessed I lacked hindsight in 2020.

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No one foresaw all the crazy shit happening this year...

They lacked 2020 vision.

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