Today I learned that Johann Sebastian Bach had to perform at weddings to make ends meet...
Turns out he was pretty baroque after all.
What did Johann Sebastian Bach say when he looked at his empty savings account?
I'm Baroque!
Hey is Johannes Kepler such a good janitor?
Because he sweeps out the same area every night.
Credit to my Physics teacher.
Why did Johann Sebastian only go to college for 2 years?
He only needed an elor's degree.
Today I learned that johann Sebastian Bach was a big time gambler...
It got so bad that he went baroque.
Sorry...
A big Swede named Sven is getting married...
And he got real drunk at the wedding party. Taking advantage of this, his best friend Johann, snuck upstairs to screw the bride in the bedroom.
Meanwhile, everybody was kidding Sven about how drunk he was getting. Finally, Sven went upstairs to bed his new wife. But when he got to the be...
Whom did the German philosopher quote when his friend dipped his hand in boiling oil?
Johann Gottfried
Why did the chicken of destiny cross the road?
Robert Frost: "To cross the road less traveled by."
Johann Friedrich von Goethe: "The eternal hen-principle made it do it."
Ralph Waldo Emerson: "It didn't cross the road; it TRANSCENDED it."
. . .
... Ernest Hemingway (*whispers*): "To die. In the rain."
A man walks into a record store...
A man walks into a record store, looking confused. The owner approaches him: "Hey, you seem a little lost. Can I show you where anything is?" "Uh yes, actually.", the man replies, "I'm looking for some classical music, as I've never listened to it before." "Oh, well we have a vast var...
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