Because of the enormity of its stupidity, there is no purpose to any of its actions."
Why did Werner Heisenberg break up with his girlfriend?
He wasn't certain exactly where their relationship was currently going, but he knew that it was moving too fast.
Why was Werner Heisenberg’s wife so unhappy with him?
Whenever he had the energy, he didn’t have the time.
German physicist Werner Heisenberg is pulled over for speeding.
The cop asked, do you know how fast you were going? Heisenberg responds, no but I know exactly where I am.
A police officer pulled over Werner Heisenberg.
The officer said “I clocked you going 75.”
Heisenberg replied “Great, now I’m lost!”
Werner Heisenberg is driving down a highway...
...when he sees a police car is flashing its lights at him. He pulls over, and so does the cop. The cops gets out, taps on Heisenberg's window, he rolls it down. "Sir," the cop asks, "do you know how fast you were going?" "No," Heisenberg replies, "but I know where I am."
Austrian humor
*One time back in the 1980s when I was living in Austria, a bunch of us went out for a beer. During the chit-chat, an American friend of mine named Margie insisted that Austrian jokes weren't funny. Her (Austrian) boyfriend Werner disagreed. Margie said, "Well, tell that mouse joke of yours." Werner...
Werner Heisenberg just unveiled a new car...
It comes with a GPS or a speedometer, but not both.
I asked my bookshop if they had a book on Werner Heisenberg.
The shop assistant said "In principle we do, but I'm uncertain".
Albert Einstein, Isaac Newton, Werner Heisenberg, Georg Ohm, Galileo Galilei, Max Planck, and Louis de Broglie were carpooling to work...
...when they got pulled over for speeding. However, when the police officer tried to ask them how fast they were going, he couldn't get a straight answer, and the group was so rowdy that they had to be brought in for questioning.
So all 7 of them are taken to the police station, and individua...
Heisenberg and Schrodinger
Werner Heisenberg and Ernst Schrodinger are driving down the road late one night, and they are stopped by a cop.
Heisenberg rolls down the window and says, “evening officer”.
The cop asked, “Do you know how fast you were going?”
Heisenberg says, “No, but I knew exactly where I ...
Science jokes
Thought i'd make a post compiling a few of my favourite science jokes. You can add your favourites in the comments below.
Q: How many physicists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: Two. One to hold the lightbulb, and the other to rotate the universe around it.
Q:...
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