I’ve been a follower of r/jokes for a long time so here are some of my favorite ones:

One, uno, eins, un.

"Un, deux, trois, quatre", radioed the French ship...

...before it cinq.

"Eins, zwei, drei", radioed the German ship vierlessly, but then silence.

"Uno, dos", radioed the Spanish ship, and then disappeared without a tres.

"One," radioed the British ship before it went two.

"Oh," radioed the American sub. "I guess we won"

You're It!

Einstein, Newton, and Pascal are playing hide-and-seek. It’s Einstein’s turn to be it, so he closes his eyes and starts counting, “Eins, zwei, drei…” Pascal runs off and hides under a big bush. Newton runs over to a nearby driveway, takes out some chalk, and draws a box around him that is one meter ...

A Disney Language Joke I made up

The Disney Princesses had cats. Tiana's was named One, Two, Three, Snow White's was Eins, Zwei, Drei, and Belle's was named Une, Deux, Trois. They decided to put the cats on rafts and race them.

Tiana and Snow White's cats made it to the end, but Belle's died because

Une, Deux, Trois,...

My grandfather told me this In German so it might already be posted somewhere here, oh and it's translated

Two guys are riding bicycles down the street.

One of the bikes fenders was loose and was making a loud noise.

So the first guy said to the second guy
"Hey your fender is too loud"

The second guy says "what?"

The first guy speaks louder
"your fender is too loud" <...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Frenchman wished to assess the buoyancy of the common household cat.

So he took three cats down to the canal and threw them in, and *un, deux, trois* cats sank.

Fortunately a kindly German saw this and jumped in (after punching the Frenchman on the nose) and rescued the cats. He looked them over and said "Huh. Bit ze vorse for vair, but I zink I can save zem"....

Why is every 3rd pool in Germany empty?

Eins
Zwei
Drei

Why can't Einstein build a wall?

He only has ein stein

Day at the Races

It is the finals for a multi terrain cat racing competition. The final event was to swim across a river.

There were three cats in the finals.

- A French cat named *Un Deux Trois*.
- An English cat named *Four Three Two*.
- A German cat named *Eins Zwei*.

During the rac...

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