Common Sense Jokes

Father to son: How did you write your exam?
.
Son: They had asked questions which I didn't know, so I wrote answer which they will not know

the other half is intelligence.

Some are born with it while others have to get it pounded into them.

It hasn’t been used in years

An uneducated father with his educated son went on a camping trip. They set-up their tent and fell asleep.
Some hours later, the father woke up his son.
Father- Look up to the sky and tell me what you see.
Son- I see millions of stars.
Father- And what does that tell you?
Son- Astrono... read more

That's common sense leaving your body.

He's unprepared, but starts looking for common sense answers and writes down:

- Contains all the nutrients a baby needs,

- Doesn't need heating,

But he still needs one more. And just as the time is about to run out, the student writes:

- Has great packaging.

They are being wiped from existence.

Common sense

The great man told his followers, 'There are 2 things in life that matters above all else - Integrity, if you'd made a promise, you carry it out, even if it bankrupts you, cripples you or kills you. The other thing is common sense, like not making that promise'.

...but he didn't make it to the bathroom.

A gal walks into a bar, orders a beer and lets loose a deep sigh. "Do you know that crazy tingly feeling you get when you think you really like someone?" she asks the bartender. "Apparently it is just common sense leaving your body."

So I only tip in pennies now.

Now, we have a nationwide coin shortage, which means we lack common cents!

Common sense

He says, “These are my children, Frankincense and Bob.”

The other man responds, “Oh, I thought the other child would have been named Myrrh.”

The father responds, “Oh no, we get that all the time. You see my wife and I are HUGE fans of particular books and movies so we named them after ... read more

Dr. : How did it happen?
Man: I was sunbathing when a female driver ran over me.
Dr. : I would say it's your fault. It's common sense not to sunbathe in the lawn when you know there are female drivers on the road.
Man: But doctor I was sunbathing on the roof!

Two physics PhD guys and mathematician PhD after a conference sit in a hotel lobby and having drinks. Suddenly the light bulb burns out over their head and maintenance guy comes and changes the light bulb. While changing it, he hands the burnt out light bulb over to the mathematician who puts it car... read more

Common sense

(my 9-year-old just came and shared that gem with me)

All it takes is a little common sense.

A MBA And A BE Student Go On A Camping Trip, Set Up Their Tent, And Fell Asleep.

Some Hours Later, The BE Wakes His MBA Friend And Says: “Look Up At The Sky And Tell Me What You See”

The MBA Replies: “I See Millions Of Stars”

The BE Asks: “What Does That Tell You?”

The MB... read more

I walked into the store to get a drink...When I walked in I noticed these 2 police officers watching some guy who was smoking while pumping gas.. I saw him & thought, "This guy didn't have any common sense & was he crazy? With the cops right there too?! But anyway, I went in and got my drink... read more

This is the story of a Rabbi named Steven. Steven was lost in the mountains of Bolivia one day. He had embarked from Lima weeks ago, but his translator had taken a rather nasty tumble and was no longer with him. But the Rabbi continued. He walked forward and up, perhaps being guided by a higher forc... read more

There was a boy named john. John didn’t have many friends growing up as he preferred to keep to himself. Johns family were farmers through and through, his favourite thing to do was to drive their tractor around and around the farm, john always adored tractors, the big back wheels and the small fron... read more