Why are New Yorkers so depressed

Because the light at the end of the tunnel is New Jersey

It takes a New Yorkers mentality to root for a football team named after something you dread getting every month.

Go Bills!

Think New Yorkers don't get along? I just saw two complete strangers share a cab...

One took the wheels and tires, the other took the battery and the radio.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light-bulb?

"Go fuck yourself!"

New Yorkers confuse me...

Half of them keep saying "fuhgeddaboudit" but the rest of them keep saying "Never forget".

Why do New Yorkers like to visit Minnesota?

Because that's where the mini apple is!

If Londoners are what you call people from London and New Yorkers are what you call people from New York, what are Hamburgers??

Delicious!!

New Yorkers are the fastest readers.

80 stories in ten seconds splat!

If you ever see three New Yorkers get into a cab without an argument

a bank has just been robbed

A New Yorker, a Las Vegan, and a Texan all meet at a bar overseas...

The New Yorker says "this bar is ok, but I'd like to drink to my hometown bar, where the server greets you with your favourite drink, and every weekend is happy hour all night."

They all nod and cheers, and drink to the New Yorkers hometown bar.

After the next couple of rounds the La...

Studies show that most New Yorkers are offended by 9/11 jokes.

The study also revealed that they thought the other 2/11 jokes were funny.

St. Peter was standing at the pearly gates of Heaven

When a group of New Yorkers walked up.

"Hey St. Petey, may we come in too Heaven?"

St. Peter replies "Well, we have never had N6e Yorkers in Heaven before, let me ask God."

He leaves the pearly gates of Heaven and goes to see God.

"God, there is a group of New Yorkers at ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I wrote a book, and the first sentence reads, “There I sat in Central Park, staring at the base of the Empire State Building across the street.”

The title of the book is “I’ve Never Been to New York But I Love Hearing New Yorkers Get Mad At This Shit”

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A guy from Nebraska goes to New York for the first time.

He's so excited, he's never been outside of Nebraska. He gets to La Guardia, and immediately tells a cabbie to take him to the Empire State Building (as he's always wanted to see it in real life). So they pull up to and he goes inside and gets on the elevator to the top of the building. He goes u...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Classic

An Englishman, a Frenchman and a New Yorker are captured by cannibals. The cannibal chief says "we're going to kill you, eat you and sow your skins to make a canoe. But you get to choose how to die."

The English man pulls out a revolver, yells "God save the Queen!" and shoots himself in the ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man is walking down Fifth Avenue in New York City.

He sees a long line of people who all appear to be anxiously waiting for something. Intrigued, he asks a woman in the line what she's waiting for.

"Apparently the President is in town raising money for his family's legal bills," she responds.

"Huh. That's got to be a lot of money. I'm ...

Laughter is the Best Medicine. OK Reddit, whats the best 9/11 Joke You've Ever Heard?

Q: How Many New Yorkers Does it Take to Screw in a Light Blub?

A: None - they all jump out of the building when it gets too hot

Not the best, I admit. But yeah - top that.

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