The guardsman, the commissar, and the orks.

Preface: In case you are not familiar with the Warhammer universe, if enough orks believe something, reality will warp to make it so. And no... I am not the author of the joke... Do get over it please.



Once upon a time, there was a fierce battle raging in the jungle between the Imperi...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A rich man is looking to start a new hobby.

He heard that Warhammer 40k is a fun pastime so he decided to pay a visit to the local GW store.

"So what exactly do I need to start this hobby?" He asked.

"Well," the manager replied calmly."You will need to sell your kidneys, half of your liver and one of your lungs. I know a doctor ...

What's the difference between a Necron and a Lawyer?

One is an emotionless robot with no respect for human life, the other is a faction in warhammer 40k

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

How many girlfriends have you had before me?

She asked casually, as she sat on the edge of my bed pretending to be interested in my Warhammer catalogue.

Fucking stupid question.

What do you call a miniature pension?

Warhammer 401k

It's nice to see women who don't lose their figures as they grow older.

They take such a long time to paint and Warhammer is expensive enough as it is.

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.