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Unsatisfied Jokes

I have to ask myself, is my wife unsatisfied?

a tiny part of me says yes

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Why are Christians always unsatisfied?

They are always waiting for the Second .

Why was the hose always unsatisfied?

It could never find anyone into its kink.

A Rabbi and his friend, a Catholic priest, were having a discussion

when the rabbi asked "Could you ever be promoted withing your church?"

The priest responded, "Well, one day, I hope to become a bishop."

The rabbi asked, "And then?"

The priest though for a second and responded, "Well, then I might become a cardinal."

The rabbi again aske...

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A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband's keys in the door. "Stay where you are", she said. "He would be so drunk that he would hardly notice".

The husband lurched in the bed and within a few minutes, slept.

A few minutes later the woman, (unsatisfied), asked her lover to continue.

The man was too scared so the woman said, "He is so messed up I'll pull out one of his hairs and he won't move a bit". So she did and He did...

What did unsatisfied wife of Russian leader say?

"Vlaadimar!" Put it in

A man's fence is broken and he neess to hire someone to fix it

So he goes online to find someone to fix his fence for him but he is unsatisfied with their prices, that is until he finds a Buddhist monk who will do it for free.

He is initially surprised by this and assumes it might be a fake listing, but since it's free he feels like he has nothing to los...

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Why was Heisenberg's wife so unsatisfied?

When her husband had the position, he couldn't find the momentum.

When he had the energy, he couldn't find the time.

What do unsatisfied customers of prosthetic feet give the manufacturer?

Their feedback.

Why do presidents have unsatisfied wives?

It takes four years to get an election.

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Jewish

No matter what this husband did in bed, his wife never achieved an .
Since a Jewish wife is entitled to pleasure, they decide to consult their Rabbi.

The Rabbi listens to their story, strokes his beard, and makes the following suggestion:
Hire a strapping young man.
<...

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Study

In 1993, the American Government funded a study to see why the head of a man's was larger than the shaft. After one year and $180,000.00, they concluded that the reason the head was larger than the shaft was to give the man more pleasure during .

After the US published the study, Ger...

A boy has a question about God

Sorry if this has been posted before. I just heard it and I’ve never seen it on here before.

There was a boy that had a question about God. He goes to his local priest to see if he has an answer. The boy presents the question and the priest is completely at a loss of words. The question is s...

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A middle manager was called into HR for a harmless ice breaker.

"Do you know why you've been sent here? One of your new employees, Gina, has levied harassment allegations against you". The stern HR rep asserted.

"What!? Gina!? Oh god, no this must be a mistake! I've only known her for a few days!" The manager replied perplexed and shocked.

"...

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Italians do it better

A virile, middle-aged Italian gentleman named Luigi was relaxing at his favorite bar in Rome when he managed to attract a spectacular young blonde woman.

Things progressed to the point where he invited her back to his apartment and, after some small talk, they retired to his bedroom where he...

My mother with dwarfism feels she is underpaid at work...

Apparently shes unsatisfied making mini Mum wage.

Ronald Reagan asks a mathematician: "What is two plus two?"

The mathematician replies "Four, Mr President."

Unsatisfied, Reagan asks a statistician. "What is two plus two?"

The statistician says "Based on our research, most people think it's between 3.8 and 4.3."

Still unsatisfied, Reagan asks an economist: "What is two plus two?"
...

What does a racer has who always finishes first

Unsatisfied partner

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A man goes out for a walk

on a nice day. Feeling somehow lucky, he stops to buy a scratch-off ticket. He scratches and... BAM! 500K$ prize.

Unbelievable, isn't It? But as he keeps on his walk, he somehow feels unsatisfied, so he stops for another ticket, he scratches it and... there he goes again! 1 MILLION!! 1.5M$ to...

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A girl is at the circus...

... and she sees an elephant. She asks her mom "What's that between the elephant's legs?"

Her mom is embarrassed and says "That's nothing, dear."

Unsatisfied with this answer, she turns to her dad and asks "Daddy, what's that between the elephant's legs?"

Her dad is straightforw...

The Meaning of Life

A Redditor walks into a bar and asks the bartender

“Bartender, get me something new and fresh from r/jokes.” He chirped

“Sorry mate, all we have are reposts from the last 8 years”

“How can this be!” The Redditor exclaimed “If I can’t get my fix from r/jokes, then what is the poi...

In Game of Thrones Winter Came...

And everyone left unsatisfied

A Native American boy and his father are walking by a creek

The boy looks to his father and asks, “Father, why does my sister have the name Beautiful River?”

The father answers, “That’s because she was conceived next to the most beautiful river.”

Unsatisfied with the answer, he asks, “So why is my brother named Golden Sky?”

“Because he...

A man contracted a rare STD...

He finally went to the hospital to get his manhood examined.

He nervously took off his pants, "Doctor, what is wrong with me? It's been getting more and more painful down there."

After close examination, the doctor said in a grim voice, "I'm afraid we have to perform surgery to have ...

A young girl asks her father, "Why is it so cold in the house?"

"We don't have any coal", he says.

"But why is there no coal?", she wants to know.

"Because I lost my job", he replies.

Still unsatisfied, she asks one more time—"And why did you lose your job?"

To which he answers, "Because there is too much coal".

Politician in China asks Man why he is leaving China to move to the US.

**Politician In China:** Why are you leaving China to go the US? Are you not satisfied with the work?

***Man In China:*** I am satisfied with the work.

**Politician In China:** Are you not satisfied with the pay?

***Man In China:*** I am satisfied with the pay.

**Politici...

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The Compassionate Preacher.

The preacher, in his Sunday sermon, used "Forgive Your Enemies" as his subject. After a long sermon, he asked how many were willing to forgive their enemies. About half held up their hands.

Not satisfied he harangued for another twenty minutes and repeated his question. This time he received ...

Paddy and Mary are having some issues in the bedroom department

Paddy and Mary are having some issues in the bedroom department so they go visit the doctor to see if he can help them out.  Mary tells the doctor that no matter what, she can never reach her special place when they make love.

The doctor examines them both and says “I can’t find anything obvi...

The Bee

There once lived a bee named barry. Barry was a very smart bee, he went through all of school with straight A's. He majored in law, and eventually ran for president. He became the president of the bee hive.

Barry, unsatisfied with his accomplishments, goes on to go through human school, fir...

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A Rabbit, a Bear, And a Genie In The Woods

A rabbit and a bear are chilling in the woods together when a genie suddenly appears. The genie says to the two of them 'I am a genie who can grant wishes. I will grant each of you three wishes, but think carefully because once I grant the wish it cannot be undone'.



Rabbit and Bear th...

A Nun and a Priest...

A nun and a priest had to go to a religion conference and could only afford a single bed hotel room. The nun offered to sleep on the couch while the priest stayed in the bed.

In the night, the nun was getting cold, so she woke the priest up and said, "Father, could you please fetch me...

The Hardest Question for a Man

A man has a wife that oftened ask the hardest question when ever they quarreled.

"If your mum and i both fell into the ocean, who would you rescue from drowning?"

He has always managed to deflect the question but it was getting harder to do so as time passed.

One day he shared h...

A pilot finds a solution

A man in his early 60’s has been a pilot for over 30 years. Between his flights, he usually enjoys a warm cup of coffee while reading the newspaper.

One day, as he is reading the news, he stumbles across an article that immediately catches his attention. The headline of the article says:
<...

It's time for some Tern Jokes!

* A group of sea-birds flew over Amsterdam.
No tern was left unstoned.

* Frans just opened up his new Deli and was doing quite well. People came in from miles around to buy his sausages and meats, and they never left unsatisfied. One day a man walks in and orders a pound of sausage. Fran...
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