I have to ask myself, is my wife unsatisfied?

a tiny part of me says yes

Why was the hose always unsatisfied?

It could never find anyone into its kink.

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An older Jewish gentleman marries a younger lady...

An older Jewish gentleman marries a younger lady, and they are very much in love. However, no matter what the husband does sexually, the woman never reaches orgasm. Since a Jewish wife is entitled to sexual pleasure, they decide to ask the rabbi. The rabbi listens to their story, strokes his beard, ...

Why was Mrs Claus unsatisfied with Santa Claus

He only Comes once a year

Ronald Reagan asks a mathematician: "What is two plus two?"

The mathematician replies "Four, Mr President."

Unsatisfied, Reagan asks a statistician. "What is two plus two?"

The statistician says "Based on our research, most people think it's between 3.8 and 4.3."

Still unsatisfied, Reagan asks an economist: "What is two plus two?"
...

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A housewife was unsatisfied with her sex life and confides this to her mother who gifted her a magical item.

Wife: "A dildo?"

Mother: "A magical dildo."

Wife: "What's so magical about it."

Mother: "Just say *Magic dildo* and name the body part you want pleasured."

Skeptical but curious, the wife takes the gift and goes to her room where she laid in bed and uttered the magical wo...

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Why was Heisenberg's wife so sexually unsatisfied?

When her husband had the position, he couldn't find the momentum.

When he had the energy, he couldn't find the time.

What do unsatisfied customers of prosthetic feet give the manufacturer?

Their feedback.

Sam walks into a bar on his birthday

It was Sam’s birthday, he just turned 18, finally a man (Sam lives in the Uk). In the excitement of being able to finally buy a pint from the bar without having to worry about being asked for ID, he approaches the woman who was bartending.

Sam, having a lack of knowledge with drinks, asks the...

Why do presidents have unsatisfied wives?

It takes four years to get an election.

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A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband's keys in the door. "Stay where you are", she said. "He would be so drunk that he would hardly notice".

The husband lurched in the bed and within a few minutes, slept.

A few minutes later the woman, (unsatisfied), asked her lover to continue.

The man was too scared so the woman said, "He is so messed up I'll pull out one of his butt hairs and he won't move a bit". So she did and He did...

A boy has a question about God

Sorry if this has been posted before. I just heard it and I’ve never seen it on here before.

There was a boy that had a question about God. He goes to his local priest to see if he has an answer. The boy presents the question and the priest is completely at a loss of words. The question is s...

A man's fence is broken and he neess to hire someone to fix it

So he goes online to find someone to fix his fence for him but he is unsatisfied with their prices, that is until he finds a Buddhist monk who will do it for free.

He is initially surprised by this and assumes it might be a fake listing, but since it's free he feels like he has nothing to los...

A man, a dog, and a goat are the only survivors of a shipwreck

A man, a dog, and a goat are the only survivors of a shipwreck

They end up on a deserted island. After a few weeks, the man is feeling very lonely and starts looking at the goat in a new light. One day he tries to have his way with it but the dog growls and scares him off. He goes to sleep un...

A man contracted a rare STD...

He finally went to the hospital to get his manhood examined.

He nervously took off his pants, "Doctor, what is wrong with me? It's been getting more and more painful down there."

After close examination, the doctor said in a grim voice, "I'm afraid we have to perform surgery to have ...

What does a racer has who always finishes first

Unsatisfied partner

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The Italian Lover, a virile middle aged Italian gentlemen named Guido was relaxing at his favorite bar in Rome when he managed to attract a spectacular young blond woman.

Things progressed to the point where he led her back to his apartment and, after some small talk, they retired to his bedroom where he fucked her senseless.

After a pleasant interlude, he asked with a smile, “So, you finish?”
She paused for a second, frowned, and replied. “No.”
Surp...

My mother with dwarfism feels she is underpaid at work...

Apparently shes unsatisfied making mini Mum wage.

Paddy and Mary are having some issues in the bedroom department

Paddy and Mary are having some issues in the bedroom department so they go visit the doctor to see if he can help them out.  Mary tells the doctor that no matter what, she can never reach her special place when they make love.

The doctor examines them both and says “I can’t find anything obvi...

The Meaning of Life

A Redditor walks into a bar and asks the bartender

“Bartender, get me something new and fresh from r/jokes.” He chirped

“Sorry mate, all we have are reposts from the last 8 years”

“How can this be!” The Redditor exclaimed “If I can’t get my fix from r/jokes, then what is the poi...

A Native American boy and his father are walking by a creek

The boy looks to his father and asks, “Father, why does my sister have the name Beautiful River?”

The father answers, “That’s because she was conceived next to the most beautiful river.”

Unsatisfied with the answer, he asks, “So why is my brother named Golden Sky?”

“Because he...

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"Bro, that last chick was hot but...

...I'm still horny as fuck. What can I get with $3?" The Brothel Manager says: "Well, we can give you a Chimp."

Man takes the chimp into a room & gets down to business. Still unsatisfied, he goes back to the manager.

Man: "Hey man, the chimp was alright but I'm still horny as fuck....

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The penis case study

The americans made a research on why a man's dickhead was larger than the shaft. After 1 year and $180,000 they concluded that the reason was to give the man pleasure during sex.

The french weren't convinced by the americans study and made their own.After 3 years and $250,000 they concluded t...

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The Compassionate Preacher.

The preacher, in his Sunday sermon, used "Forgive Your Enemies" as his subject. After a long sermon, he asked how many were willing to forgive their enemies. About half held up their hands.

Not satisfied he harangued for another twenty minutes and repeated his question. This time he received ...

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An old man goes into the brothel

He asks for a blowjob, gets it, and leaves unsatisfied after 30 minutes as he couldn't get an erection.
A week later he does the same again. And this repeats week for week.
The fifth time the prostitute asks: "Why are you doing this? You could spare the money as you clearly can't get an erecti...

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A girl is at the circus...

... and she sees an elephant. She asks her mom "What's that between the elephant's legs?"

Her mom is embarrassed and says "That's nothing, dear."

Unsatisfied with this answer, she turns to her dad and asks "Daddy, what's that between the elephant's legs?"

Her dad is straightforw...

In Game of Thrones Winter Came...

And everyone left unsatisfied

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A Rabbit, a Bear, And a Genie In The Woods

A rabbit and a bear are chilling in the woods together when a genie suddenly appears. The genie says to the two of them 'I am a genie who can grant wishes. I will grant each of you three wishes, but think carefully because once I grant the wish it cannot be undone'.



Rabbit and Bear th...

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A man goes to a doctor

"D d doctor I ha have this terrible s s stuttering. C can you h h help me?"

The doctor immediately has an idea of what might cause the stuttering and asks the man to take off his pants and underwear.

The man does as the doctor told him to and reveals his huge penis which reaches almos...

A pilot finds a solution

A man in his early 60’s has been a pilot for over 30 years. Between his flights, he usually enjoys a warm cup of coffee while reading the newspaper.

One day, as he is reading the news, he stumbles across an article that immediately catches his attention. The headline of the article says:
<...

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The Italian Stallion and more

The Italian Lover

A virile, middle-aged Italian gentleman named Guido was relaxing at his favourite bar in Rome when he managed to attract a spectacular young blond woman.

Things progressed to the point where he invited her back to his apartment and, after some small talk, they retired...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

There was a princess

who came of age, so her parents the King and Queen called for all princes to come and court her.

Day after day, each suitor came by, telling the princess what they would give her and why she should marry them. This went on for a few weeks, and the princess remained unsatisfied.

Sudden...

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A husband and wife were preparing for a night of wild sex..

When suddenly, before it happened the husband died.

The wife was devastated and left unsatisfied. She decided to cut off his penis and keep it to pleasure herself, and she stuck it on a wall, and used it almost daily.

Somehow, a neighbor found out about it, removed the penis, put a hol...

Politician in China asks Man why he is leaving China to move to the US.

**Politician In China:** Why are you leaving China to go the US? Are you not satisfied with the work?

***Man In China:*** I am satisfied with the work.

**Politician In China:** Are you not satisfied with the pay?

***Man In China:*** I am satisfied with the pay.

**Politici...

A Reindeer is Walking Along in the Forest...

A reindeer is walking along in the forest when a pear with a mouth hits his head, quickly followed by a second talking pear. The reindeer, named Dave, turns to the first pear and says, "What was that for?"

In retort, the pear responds, "Sorry, I fell."

Unsatisfied with his response Dav...

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A new recruit is sent to an outpost in the Jungle.

A new recruit is sent out in the jungle to a small outpost, where there are only a few other soldiers there, all of them experienced veterans. After a few weeks, the soldier begins to feel a little unsatisfied with his sex life, so he goes to ask the sergeant what he can do about it. The sergeant sa...

It's time for some Tern Jokes!

* A group of sea-birds flew over Amsterdam.
No tern was left unstoned.

* Frans just opened up his new Deli and was doing quite well. People came in from miles around to buy his sausages and meats, and they never left unsatisfied. One day a man walks in and orders a pound of sausage. Fran...

The Bee

There once lived a bee named barry. Barry was a very smart bee, he went through all of school with straight A's. He majored in law, and eventually ran for president. He became the president of the bee hive.

Barry, unsatisfied with his accomplishments, goes on to go through human school, fir...

A Nun and a Priest...

A nun and a priest had to go to a religion conference and could only afford a single bed hotel room. The nun offered to sleep on the couch while the priest stayed in the bed.

In the night, the nun was getting cold, so she woke the priest up and said, "Father, could you please fetch me...

The Hardest Question for a Man

A man has a wife that oftened ask the hardest question when ever they quarreled.

"If your mum and i both fell into the ocean, who would you rescue from drowning?"

He has always managed to deflect the question but it was getting harder to do so as time passed.

One day he shared h...

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Sex mad rooster!

There is this farmer and one day he goes into the chicken coop and the rooster says to him "dude I am gagging for a fuck" so he takes the rooster into the hen hutch next door and closes the door, moments later there is a huge commotion, feathers fly out the window there is raucous clucking and crowi...

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