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Fox News Jokes

What's the difference between Fox News and the North Korean government?

One is a racist prick of a system that is incredibly biased and is trying to force you to to follow its beliefs and the other is the North Korean government.

What's the difference between a washing machine and Fox news?

No difference: They both spin dirty laundry till it smells better.

Why did the Fox News Christmas tree catch fire?

They left it too close to the gaslight.

Fox news in four words:

"I'm not racist, but..."

How many American conservatives do you need to screw in a lightbulb?

Ten.

One holds the bulb, the other nine wait for Fox News to spin it.

Fox News' slogan is "Fair and Balanced".

That's it. That's the joke.

They held a beauty pageant for all those Fox News blondes...

And named the winner "Miss Information".

Latest Fox News election poll shows Trump way ahead ...

... in all 87 states.

What would the headline be if Barack Obama walked on water across a lake in full view of a Fox News reporter?

"OBAMA CAN'T SWIM"

It turns out, 'Fox News' has no actual coverage of foxes.

I was also disappointed by BBC news.

Antiwork did an interview on Fox News to try to create a good public image of their sub

It didn't work.

What's the difference between a Shakespeare comedy and Fox News?

One's The Taming of the Shrew, the other is the shaming of the true.

Caitlyn Jenner is going to be working on Fox News.

Now they’ll have two tuckers.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Fox News recently interviewed Texas attorney general Ken Paxton....

Fox News recently interviewed Texas attorney general Ken Paxton and asked him if it was true that they were going to bring back sodomy laws. He answered: "No ifs, ands, or butts."

Fox News has determined the cause of the recent plane crash.

It was the left wing.

Dear Fox News.....

I have yet to see any news about foxes.

Sincerely, Disappointed viewer.....

A Christian, a Muslim, and a Witch all die and go to the afterlife.

A Christian, a Muslim, and a Witch of the Norse gods all die and go to the afterlife.

They find that, waiting for them at the entrance to the afterlife is Anubis, waiting with a set of scales, with a feather on one side.

Above Anubis is a sign, "You wait with your heart, if less than f...

Why did the stroke victim start watching Fox News.

He had started leaning to the right.

Trump often appears on Fox news, which is ironic

Because a fox often appears on Trump's head

A Banker, a Fox News fan and a welfare recipient are at a table sharing 12 cookies...

The banker takes 11 cookies and says to the Fox News fan: "Watch out for the welfare guy, he wants your cookie!".

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A black man, a Muslim, and a Communist walk into a bar...

The bartender says, "Hello, Mr. President!"

Courtesy of my Fox News-watching mom...

My daughters fall asleep to white noise.

So in the evenings, we turn on Fox News.

Islamic joke I saw somewhere

A man walking in New York’s Central Park sees a Rottweiler attacking a little girl. He subdues the dog and saves her life.

A passing Fox News reporter says: “You’re a hero. Tonight’s TV news bulletin will say: ‘Brave New Yorker Saves Child.”

The man replies: “I’m a tourist from Saudi A...

Why does Thanos watch Fox News?

Because it’s fair and perfectly balanced.

TIL FOX news was started by a Frenchman

Unfortunately, they had to americanize the name from FAUX news

Fox News is reporting President Trump's polling at an all-time low....

...with only a 108% approval rating.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Have you heard the one about the President and the porn star?

No?

You should really watch something other than Fox News.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why do Fox News and CNN journalists go to the same gym?

It has a really great spin class.

Why God? Why?

One day a fellow was watching Fox News and learned about a new virus that was rapidly spreading and quickly killing those who got sick with it. The nightly news reports got worse and worse, this Covid-19 virus was spreading around the world and killing increasingly large numbers of people. But he wa...

A Jewish joke updated for modern times

Pastor Jackson and his secretary were sitting in a coffeehouse in Washington DC in 2022. "Pastor Jackson," said his secretary, "I notice you're reading Fox News! I can't understand why. A Black libel website! Are you some kind of masochist, or, God forbid, a self-hating Black person?"

"On the...

A cold snap across the United States has seen Texas dealing with temperatures as low as -18

The demand for electricity has led to blackouts across the state, causing some people to go without Fox News for so long, they've stopped blaming the weather on Joe Biden.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Black man kills conservative politician!

The final Fox News spin on Osama's death.

Why does President Trump only drink liquor made by Fox News?

Everything else is fake booze.

People are mad because MTV doesn't show music videos. What about Fox News?

They haven't shown a fox in months.

(Craig Ferguson)

A journalist friend of mine asked if I wanted to hear the good news or bad news first

Being a pessimist, I chose the bad news.

She said, "Alright, Breitbart and Fox News it is then..."







^(Wasn't sure if anyone's done this joke before but couldn't find anything like it in search function; please don't yell at me if it is a repost)

Top news stories for yesterday

CNN: Trump phone call

MSNBC: Trump phone call

Fox news: Does walking a dog make you happier?

The President invites the Pope to lunch on a boat.

The Pope accepted and during lunch, a puff of wind blew the pontiff's hat off, right into the water.

It floated off about 50 feet, then the wind died down and it just floated in place.

The crew and the Secret Service were scrambling to launch a boat to go get it, when Biden waved them ...

"Hey honey, I didn't know they were making an Idiocracy 2." The man said to his wife...

"Oh," she said, glancing at the TV. " You are just on Fox news."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Saw someone post this on Facebook. Got a kick out of it.

This morning I was awoken by my alarm clock powered by electricity
generated by the public power monopoly regulated by the U.S. Department of Energy.

I then took a shower in the clean water provided by a municipal water
utility.

After that, I turned on the TV to one of the FCC-re...

FOX new has saved my legs!

I got into a terridle car crash and and lost the use of my legs. When I was in the hospital, FOX news came on the TV. I got up to change the channel.

George HW Bush fell and broke his neck today

It's in the news. Today George HW Bush fell and broke his neck at home in Maine. Fox news is blaming it on Hillary. Donald Trump said his Mexican Maid pushed him down the stairs.

Pepsi: Well THAT was the PR nightmare of the century.

Fox News: Hold my beer.

United Airlines: Jinx, owe me a Coke?

Pepsi: For reals?

Sean Spicer: Make it a double.

Mario was sick of jumping around all day

He felt like he should be more politically involved. A few weeks ago, his friend Toad helped him set up a TV (mostly for watching trashy reality shows), but Mario became obsessed with US news networks. CNN, Fox News, MSNBC, you name it. He had heard before of American democracy, and found it prefera...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Cringe Airlines

What happens when you combine Fox News, CNN, and a Fleshlight.

You get a plane

The right wing, the left wing, and the cockpit.

What is the hare's favorite horror show on TV?

Fox News.

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