Foot Fetish Jokes - 48 Hilarious Foot Fetish Jokes

Why do people with foot fetishes never win?

Because they like the taste of defeat

What kind of candy do you offer a woman with a ?

Mentos

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I met up with this girl the other night that also has a ...

I met up with this girl the other night that also has a . When she got to my place, she asked if we could just to some foot together instead of having . It wasn't what I had in mind, but I agreed anyway. At the end of it, both of us felt pretty disgusted by the whole th...

If a man with a cheats on his wife...

Does that mean he got off on the wrong foot?

I have a ...

I have tried using meters but it just doesn't work for me.

What do you call a klansman with a ?

Black toes intolerant

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My girlfriend left me because she has a .

My is only 11 inches.

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Me and my friend have an amputee .

I know, it's gross, but we can only on prosthetic legs. Anyway, our last three-way with an amputee, we both prematurely came on her real toes! I had to politely ask the girl, "Can we start over? I feel like we got off on the wrong foot."

My wife begged me not to tell anyone about her .

Well I’ve only gone and put my foot in it.

I was once accused of having a …

…but that’s a lie. I much prefer the Metric system.

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There was a couple who explored but they finally decided they liked “oral” more than “.”

They were “head over heels” in love.

You know what they call a in Paris?

They got the metric system, they wouldn't know what the hell a foot is.

Yesterday i found out that i got a

Because i like Mentos

Why won't Americans switch to the metric system?

They have a

My GF told me my isn't because I love her feet

It's because my first crush was my sock

Did you hear about the guy with a who would intentionally lose?

He loved the smell of da feet!

I told my girlfriend I have a ...

She said, “this is getting out of hand.”

My friend told me he had a ...

So I just started hitting him with my 30cm ruler while he moaned.

I wanted to show appreciation to my new girlfriend's . Little did I know the woman in the bed was her sister..

I got off on the wrong foot.

He: I have a ...

She: An uncontrollable desire to return to the imperial measurement system??

What do non-Americans call someone with a ?

A meter maniac..

I have recently discovered that I have a , but I'm not sure where to start.

I just want to get off on the right foot.

I've got a , but they have to have all ten toes...

I'm lack-toes intolerant.

My SO has a which I've never found appealing. After a bit of pressure and experimenting, my SO finally won me over.

I ultimately accepted defeat.

What do people with foot fetishes and recovery vehicle drivers have in common?

Tow (toe) jobs

What is someone with a 's favourite genre of music?

Sole

What’s a girl with a ’s favorite candy?

Mentos

How do you get someone with a to go on a date with you?

You put your best foot forward!

What's the difference between a demoralizing loss, and someone with a ?

One is a crushing defeat, the other has a crush ON the feet.

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I have a ...

and this morning I was to a photo of my girlfriend's foot. I later realized it was actually a photo of her sister's foot. I guess you could say I got off on the wrong foot.

All of my European friends tell me I have a .

I tell them, I’ll never understand the metric system.

My friend has a and his crush asked him out last night

She told him to meet her on Sunday but he already had plans with me and some friends

He decided to come with us and told us”you know I wouldn’t ditch you, bros before toes!”

The trouble with having an Asian fetish AND a ...

You're bound to get off on the Wong foot.

If you have a ...

... and happen to get involved in an involving other foot fetishists, always remember to be polite and attentive to those around you.

You don't want to get off on the wrong foot.

Why is it difficult for people with foot fetishes to make friends?

Cause they always seem to get off on the wrong foot.

What did the taekwondo expert say to the man with a ?

Get ready to taste defeat

Did you hear about the doctor with a ?

He was arrested for having his way with the comatoes.

What was the romantic with a looking for?

a sole mate

Where do Peeping Toms with foot fetishes hold their annual conference?

Topeka, KS

Apparently I have a . Feet make me so excited, but I'm always ashamed. I really want to deny it, but after a year of lying to myself...

I accept defeat

What was the name of that south Korean who had a ?

Suk Sum Toh

What did the German say when he quit his club?

All feet are same.

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2 Dirty Jokes as told to me by a homeless guy.

If a guy with a cheats on his wife, would you say *he got off on the wrong foot?*

**and** (no offense meant to all the women out there, I swear!)

You know why god invented the yeast infection? So that women would also know what it's like to live with a miserable !
...

Soul Searching

Lately I've been soul searching; discovered I have a .

Nearly every country in the world uses metric, except for America...

because America has a .

I've heard so many theories about why America won't drop the imperial system

But we all know it's really just a

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A man decides he wants to find a girl at a bar.

So he goes to the most popular one in town. Upon entering the bar, he spies a gorgeous woman and approaches her.
Immediately, he says "Before I begin charming you, I would like to admit that I have a particular ."
"How particular?" the woman asks intrigued.
"Well, for one, I am o...

Why did the guy get an erection when he saw a ruler?

He had a .

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