This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Heard on the Underground

A list of actual announcements that London Tube train drivers have made to their passengers...
1) "Ladies and Gentlemen, I do apologize for the delay to your service. I know you're all dying to get home, unless, of course, you happen to be married to my ex-wife, in which case you'll want to cro...

I went into a pub in Stratford and said in my best Shakespearean voice,

"A flagon of your finest ale please, Falstaff. "

They threw me out. Told me I was bard.

The camping shop in Stratford-upon-Avon is having a sale of last season's stock. Their slogan....?

Now.. is the winter of our discount tents.

A recent archeological dig was finished at historic Stratford-upon-Avon

They found many typewriters and many, many, more monkey skeletons

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.