A pastor, a nun, and a blind man were talking about the best position to pray in
The pastor says, "I think the proper way to pray is on your knees with your hands together and your head bowed."
The nun says "That's a good one brother Tim but I think we should pray with our eyes wide open looking up into the sky like a child would speak to their father."
The blind ...
A musician specializing in bowed string instruments who has a boring play style could be called 'a dull fiddler'.
Which is not so bad until you read it out loud.
Three swedes found mysterious tracks from the forest
"It is a bunny." Said the first
"It is a rabbit." Said the second
the third one bowed to look and a train ran over him.
A man walks into a bar an drinks 10 straight double whiskys one after the other, suddenly he keels over rubbing his stomach head bowed, barman says to the man, 'what's the matter?' Man says 'I shouldn't of drank that whisky with what I've got', barman says 'why what have you got?'
Man says 2quid
An Alabama pastor said to his congregation, “Someone in this congregation has spread a rumor that I belong to the Ku Klux Klan.
This Is A Horrible Lie. I Am Embarrassed And Do Not Intend To Accept This. Now, I Want The Party Who Said This To Stand And Ask Forgiveness From God ." No One Moved.
The Preacher Continued, “Do You Have The Nerve To Face Me And Admit This Is A Falsehood? Remember, You Will Be Forgiven And ...
I didn't think my doctor could fix my bowed legs.
I stand corrected.
Why do cowgirls have bowed legs?
Because cowboys eat with their hats on.
Sir Dimalot strode into the throne room and bowed before the king.
"Your majesty," he said, "I have been robbing and pillaging on your behalf all day, burning the villages of your enemies in the north."
The king looked perplexed. "But I do not have any enemies in the north."
"Ah," replied the knight, realising his mistake. "I fear you do now."
A wife invited some people to dinner.
At the table, she turned to their six-year-old daughter and said, "Would you like to say the blessing?" "I wouldn't know what to say," the girl replied. "Just say what you hear Mommy say," the wife answered. The daughter bowed her head and said, "Lord, why on earth did I invite all these pe...
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The Donald Went Down to Georgia
The Donald went down to Georgia.
He was lookin' for a vote to steal.
He was in a bind 'cause he was way behind.
He was willing to make a deal
When he came across this old man givin' a speech and doin' it hot.
And the Donald jumped upon a hickory stump and said "Man...