Office Supplies Jokes - 9 Hilarious Office Supplies Jokes

I used to sell office supplies to the mafia, file cabinets and label makers and such

I was involved in very organized crime

Anybody know someone that wants to buy letter openers, staplers, pens, and other office supplies?

Most of it is labeled with Capital Hill or U.S. Senate but it's all usable. Let me know! Thanks.

Who is constantly bossing around the office supplies?

The ruler.

Did you hear about the man addicted to eating office supplies?

It was a staple of his diet.

What do you call a Mexican gang that steals office supplies?

Rubber Banditos

Guy bumps into a friend ...

... and says "Hey, man, can you believe that they fired me for stealing office supplies?"

Friend says, "Wow, that's crazy, they must really be hardnosed about that. Where did you work again?"

"Office Depot."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Three men go into confession...

The first man goes to the Father and says, "Father, forgive me, I stole office supplies from work this past week." The Father says, "I see. Speak the 'Our Father' 15 times, and go and drink from the Holy water. Go in peace." The second man comes in and says to the Father, "Father, I have sinned. I c...

My buddy Sam is a thief.

My friend Sam wasn't always this way. You see, we grew up in the poor part of town, although his dad worked hard and provided, where mine was not around much and when he was my mom always yelled at him to find a permanent job. As a child I remember showing up to his house every day before school and...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

It wouldn't have been as funny if it hadn't actually happened... [NSFW]

I worked in a store with very religious owners. This meant that the employees were careful with their speech, never swore, etc.

One day, my co-worker decides to tell me a dirty joke that she heard at the bar the night before. Here is the joke *as she would have heard it at the bar*:
...

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