UPJOKE
pass outdarkenturnblacknessinkyblackendarknessdrearyjet blacktotal darknesspitch darksombrefaintswarthysomber

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Black Out Drunk and in Love

A man woke up in the morning with a terrible hangover and he couldn't remember what he had done the night before. On the table next to the bed he saw two aspirins, a glass of water, and a note from his wife, saying, "Honey, there is a hot breakfast waiting for you in the kitchen. Love you lots!"
...

Whats the worst part about a black out in Detroit?

All the pairs of floating eyes

There was a black out in my neighborhood last night.

The police told us to stay inside until they shot him.

A joke my Polish friend loved.

[Full of errors I'm sure. On to the brilliant joke.]

A polish farmeris tilling his field. It's another beautiful spring day when suddenly his plough hits something. Upon inspection he sees that it's some sort of golden lamp. He dusts it off and a genie comes out of it and says to the humble p...

Jane and Erica are talking in heaven

"How did you die?" Jane asks Erica.
She replies, "I froze to death."
"Oh, that's terrible!" says Jane.
"It wasn't too bad, after a while you start to get a sort of peaceful feeling, just before you black out. How did you die?"
"Well," she says, "I suspected my husband was cheat...

We saw a blind man walking at night (true story)

My girlfriend: whats he doing walking when its pitch black out!
Me: ......

A priest, a rabbi, and a Baptist preacher were out fishing together

"We should all confess our sins," the priest suggests. "Give it a shot and see how it feels."

The three agree, and the Catholic goes goes first. "I'm an alcoholic. I drink till I black out every night."

"I love watching naked women on the internet," the rabbi confesses. "I just can't s...

Karen calls the police due to a blackout in her neighborhood

Karen: Excuse me, there's a black out in my neighborhood!

Police: Call Centerpoint Energy.

Karen: You don't understand, he's still here!

An Aurora Colorado police officer walks into a bar...

Just kidding he was black out drunk and passed out in his car instead.

Bill walks out into the street and manages to get a taxi just as it comes driving by.

He gets into the taxi, and the driver says, "Perfect timing. You're just like Dave."

"Who?"

"Dave Smith. He's this guy who did everything right. Like my coming along when you needed a cab. It would have happened like that to Dave."

"There are always a few clouds over everyone," ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Honeymoon.

Two virgins had just had their wedding and needed to leave for their honeymoon trip immediately after the reception. The drive to the airport was a couple of hours and they were on a tight schedule to make the flight. As they were driving down this lonely stretch of highway they got to talking about...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.