UPJOKE

No Man Jokes

After my prostate exam the doctor walked out and the nurse walked in. Then she asked me something no man wants to hear..

Who was that?

What's at the centre of No Man's Sky universe?

A refund.

credit to /u/xROSSTHEHOSSx (saw it on another post as comment, thought it deserved own post)

No man is an island

except when he's having a bath

After my proctology exam I was left alone in the exam room for a few minutes. Then the nurse came in and whispered three words no man ever wants to hear.

"Who was that?"

No man is complete until he's married.

Then he's finished

There is a new coding language that no man or woman has learned

It's nonbinary

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why do men give cold women their jackets?

No man wants a blowjob from a woman with chattering teeth

The world’s first great fisherman possessed something that no man before him ever had.

Allure.

They say no man is an island,

But drink enough and you're a nation.

A goat gets his wish granted by a genie.

He wishes to be turned into a human being. After his transformation, the, now, man is so grateful to the genie. He asks "How can I ever repay you?"

The genie just has this request: That the man make the most of his life and live like no man has lived before; love like no man has loved before;...

No man should have to watch his woman work for a living.

That’s why, as her pimp, I have to stay outside while she does her tricks.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man decided to tattoo his wife's name on his penis before going to their honeymoon

When erect it proudly reads *Wendy* on the side of his shaft, but when soft it only shows *Wy*.

While on his honeymoon in the Caribbean, he is using the bathroom and notices the guy in the urinal next to him also has a *Wy* on his penis. He then asks the guy if his wife is named Wendy.
...

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