Helicopter Pilot Jokes

He says to his wife, “I’m getting up there in age, and I’ve always wanted to ride in a helicopter.”

His wife says, “absolutely not. 50 bucks is 50 bucks. You don’t need to ride in a helicopter.”

The next year at the fair, he sees the helicopter booth again and he asks again. The conver... read more

Walter took Ethel to the state fair every year, and every time he would say to her, "Ethel, you know that I'd love to go for a ride in that helicopter." But Ethel would always reply, "I know that Walter, but that helicopter ride is 50 dollars and 50 dollars is 50 dollars."

Finally, they went... read more

Every year for 45 years James and Lucille had gone to the state Fair. Every yearJames told Lucille he wanted to go on the helicopter flight. "Its only 50 dollars" he would say. Every year Lucille would say "50 dollars is fifty dollars" and that was the end of the discussion.

On their 46th ... read more

Their names are Andrew and Harry

In Akula

One has an apple, one has a banana, and one has a hand grenade. The first pilot doesn't want his apple so he throws it out the window, the second pilot doesn't want his banana so he throws it out the window, and the third pilot doesn't want his hand grenade, so he throws it out the window. When the ... read more

It has it's ups and downs

**'In honor of this holy season' Saint Peter said, 'You must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas to**
**get into heaven.'**


**The Army helicopter pilot thumbed through his pockets and pulled out a lighter. He flicked it on. 'It's a candle', he said.**


**It... read more

"Then (pointing to the rotor) I switched off the fan."

The couple is in their 40's and haven't been in about 20 years, since before they got married. The husband sees a sign that reads "Helicopter Rides: $50". He then turns to his wife and says, "Ethel, let's ride the helicopter. I've always wanted to ride a helicopter, I think it'd be romantic. We can ... read more

Herman and Zelda meet, fall in love, and marry. They're a young couple without much money, but lots of love between them. Every summer, they make a point to attend the county fair because they love walking hand in hand and exploring the attractions. And every summer, there's a helicopter ride at the... read more

Ethel and Ernie had been married over 40 years and a fair had come to town which offered a helicopter ride. Ernie really wanted to ride the helicopter and so they went and upon getting there Ethel told Ernie he couldn’t go because the ride cost $50. Ernie pleaded with his wife and she kept refusing ... read more

*Sorry for long post, but it's worth it*

They come across a stunt helicopter ride. The old man watches in awe as this helicopter does flips and various other tricks.
"I'd love to go do that!" Says the man.
"But dear," says his wife "it's $50 and I want our retirement money to last"
... read more

There was a helicopter pilot lost over Seattle on a particularly cloudy day. He finally comes up next to an office building and holds up a sign to person in the window. The sign read "WHERE AM I?" The person in window responded with their own sign, which read "IN A HELICOPTER".

The pilot imm... read more

Lois and Stan have been married for 35 years and every year they go to the state fair when it's in town. This year they have a new ride called 'The Helicopter ride'. $50 for a ride in the helicopter for 25 minutes. Stan really wants to ride it so he asks his wife if they can go. She declines say... read more

A man jumps into the ocean and decides to put his life in God's hands. He is treading water for 45 mins when a tugboat comes by. The captain shouts to him, "get in and we will take you to shore!" The man calls back, "no thanks, I'm waiting for God to save me." The captain looks perplexed but dri... read more

A man is standing on a Texas roadside with his broken VW Beetle.

A man in a Lamborghini pulls over and offers to help him. The Beetle owner agrees, and the guy from the Lambo tells him to flash his high beams if they are going too fast.

So they go. At some point, the Lambo+Beetle comb... read more

Required qualifications:

- Work experience of 50 years or more;
- Incumbent must defeat a dragon;
- Willingness to work on weekends and holidays;
- Helicopter piloting licence;
- Ability to programme in any language imaginable;
- Knowledge of Swahili at least at uppеr intеrmеdi... read more