So sad to hear about Ghislaine Maxwell's tragic suicide ...
Oh wait, that's tomorrow, right?
BREAKING NEWS: Ghislaine Maxwell, former on again / off again partner of Epstein, has been arrested by the FBI.
In other news, Prince Andrew has just suffered a heart attack, Bill Clinton has suddenly developed Alzheimer’s, and all prison guards at Maxwell’s detention centre have suddenly had to take long naps...
British woman in New York pummels a teenager into submission and is congratulated by Royalty
But enough about Ghislaine Maxwell, let us celebrate Emma Raducanu's achievments instead.
Well, might as well get this out of the way...
Ghislaine Maxwell didn't kill herself.
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