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Aurelius Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What did Marcus Aurelius say to the stripper?

Damn girl you've got some Epictetus.

What did Marcus Aurelius say after narrowly saving his bust from falling off its shelf?

That's a relief.

Marcus Aurelius was a Roman Emperor, a very smart man and ahead of his time.

A strict disciplinarian he hated when his soldiers drank on the job but had no way of policing it. Until he realised that the offending soldiers would urinate much more than the sober ones. So he started to measure the output of the soldiers. Do you know what he used to measure it?

Roman Urin...

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