At a position of entry for asylum seekers, the functionaries have started to not require first and last name anymore, since some of the refugees had been analphabets.

Instead all they want now is two x's, one for first, one for last name. So they take the asylum seekers in, record their two crosses and move on.

At some point a woman comes in and writes down three x's. The person tending to her tells her: "Hey, you only need to make two x's.", to which she...

An Asylum Seeker has been found dead in a cheese vat.

Police are unsure of his nationality but say he looks Kurdish.

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An asylum seeker is at the side of the road eating grass.

A man pulls up in his car and says, "Hey! Don't eat that. Come home with me and I'll feed you."

The asylum seeker replies, "I have four wives and twelve kids, can they come too?"

The man says, "No, I've only got a small lawn!"

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A starving asylum seeker is greeted at Dover by a good fairy who grants him three wishes.

The asylum seeker says "I'm hungry." (POW) a huge banquet appears! He then says "Now I want a nice house." (POW) a big mansion with a swimming pool appears. He then says "I want to be British." (POW) everything vanishes! He asks "Where has everything gone?" the fairy says "You're British now mate. Y...

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How do you confuse a Daily Mail reader?

Tell him that asylum seekers kill pedophiles.

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