UPJOKE
hillunited states

What do Rubik’s cubes and your wee wee have in common?

Well for most people the more you play with them the harder they get... for me, I play with them for a few seconds and then it’s finished.

A pig walks into a bar and orders ten beers.

As soon as the pig is finished drinking the beers, he pays the bartender and starts to leave the bar.

"Wait!" says the bartender. "You drank so much beer. Wouldn't it be wise to use the bathroom before leaving?"

"Not for me," says the pig. "I'm the type of pig that goes wee wee wee all...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why did the little pig go wee wee wee all the way home?

Because the wolf told him to piss off!

This little old lady is quite the entrepreneur.

A little old lady was walking down the street dragging two large plastic garbage bags behind her.

One of the bags was ripped and every once in a while a $20 bill fell out onto the sidewalk.

Noticing this, a policeman stopped her and said, "Ma'am, there are $20 bills falling out of that...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I just finished having terrible sex with a french girl...

She kept yelling "Wee Wee Wee" and it was very off putting. She should have gone before we started

A pig walks into a bar, orders twenty beers, and starts chugging them all one by one.

“That’s impressive,” says the bartender. “Want to know where the bathroom is?”



The pig replies, “No thanks, pal. I’m just going to go wee wee wee all the way home.”

A mom picks up her 5 year old girl from kindergarten

A mom picks up her 5 year old girl from kindergarten. The girls gets into the car and says - "Mom, Timmy's wee wee is like a peanut!". The mother laughs and asks "why is it small?". "No" the girls answers, "it's salty"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An old man marries a young virgin...

and he's very excited for the wedding night. She's in bed and he comes out of the bathroom naked. She giggles. He says, "do you know what this is?" She says, "that's a wee wee," giggling. He say's "we call that a penis." She says, "I've seen a lot of penises, and that's a wee wee!"

[Request] Need jokes to cheer up BIL after surgery with less than desired results

Hi /r/jokes!

My brother-in-law had major surgery on his fully functional leg two days ago. He came out of the surgery unable to move his foot. There is no apparent reason for the lack of foot functionality.

I am here to request a wide range of jokes about his foot. Clean jokes to d...

Little Susie comes home crying to her mom....

Mom: what happened ?

Susie : today I had an argument with little Johny and he pulled down his pants and pointed at his wee wee and said ' I'm a boy so I have this , you are a girl ,so you don't have this '

Mom : don't worry darling , when you grow up , if you are a good girl , you can...

A Pig Walks Into A Bar,

And orders 13 beers, 5 shots and 2 large waters over 3 hrs. He then orders 7 more beers and 3 shots over another 2 hrs.

The Bartender asks him "Mr. Pig, you've drank so much! Don't you have to go to the bathroom?" The pig replies, "yes but I'm the little pig that goes wee wee all the way hom...

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