Job Site Jokes - 12 Hilarious Job Site Jokes

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A man and a woman are working together on a job site

The man realizes he forgot to grab his 2 pound hammer and he and the woman are too far away from each other to understand what either of them are saying, so he tries to signal her.

To represent his need for the 2 pound hammer, he points at his eyes, makes a number 2 with his fingers and a wav...

Boss shows up at a job site

Boss: "Bob where were you I've been looking for you since morning!!!!! It's lunch time already!!!!"

Bob: "Boss, a good employee is hard to find."

My friend told me that there is no other job site than monster.com now a days..

I said INDEED

I heard a guy was playing with himself while watching construction workers on a job site...

Guess he was getting off on the ground floor.

An Italian, Irish and Polish construction workers take their lunch break on a rooftop at their job site.

The Italian man opens his lunch pail and in despondently exclaims,

"Spaghetti and meatballs *again*!? Every day my wife makes me the same thing and I just can't take it anymore."

The Irishman opens his lunch pail and angrily declares,

"Shepard's pie, ugh!!! Another day of Shepar...

A rookie carpenter is on his first day of a new job...

The foreman greets him at the job site and tells him his first task will be to nail some sheathing on a roof. The rookie grabs a hammer and nails and gets to work.

The foreman watches the rookie work for a while, and when he's finished he calls him over. The foreman says, "I think your nickna...

An owner of a painting company needs to hire a painter for a job he is doing

So he goes down to unemployment to hire a painter. They tell him they don't have any - the only person they have at the moment is a gynecologist. He says that won't do, he needs a painter. They tell him they are sorry. He really needs an extra set of hands so he decides to take the gynecologist.
...

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"Your one and only job is to supply the miners"

The foreman told the asian man before leaving the job site.

Upon the foreman's return a week later he noticed one of the job site workers lackadaisically lounging in the sun.

"Hey Bob! How are ya? Why arent you workin boy?" said the foreman.

"Im too hungry to work. That chinama...

Pierre the French Canadian got a job roofing

He was taking 100 lb bundles of shingles up the ladder to the roof. On his way up, the roofer slipped and pushed a bundle down on him. It clipped the side of his head, slicing off his ear. Everyone on the job site helped him look for his ear on the ground. One guy finally hollered “found it”. Pierre...

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Little Trevor's father works building houses.

He wants to spend a day on the job site, his mother is reluctant but eventually yields and says yes.

The next day they come home from his day with dad and she asks what he learned.

Little Trevor says "Well first you cut the fucking boards but the motherfuckers won't fit. So you have to...

Graft 101.

A Mayor in a small town is trying to secure bids to repair the town's Main Street Bridge. He finds three contractors - one from Cincinnati, one from New York, and one from Washington, D.C. - and invites them all to town to bid on the job.

The Cincinnati man arrives first, inspects the job si...

Strong Man Contest

A strong young man at a construction site was bragging that he could outdo anyone when it comes to pure strength.

He made a special case of making fun of one of the older workers at the job site. After several minutes of ranting, the older worker had had enough.

"Why don't you put your...

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