UPJOKE

Twenty Second Jokes

I was on the phone with my wife and said, "I'm almost home honey, please put the coffee maker on." After a twenty second pause, I asked, "You still there sweetheart?" She replied, "Yeah..."

"But I don't think the coffee maker wants to talk right now!"

My friend told me that avengers endgame is twenty second film in the series.

It sure felt longer than that.

Which President had the shortest term?

Grover Cleveland.

He was the twenty second President.

I don’t know why everyone thinks Avengers: Endgame is long...

Isn’t it Marvell Studios’ twenty second movie?

I don't understand why my girlfriend complains about how long I last in bed.

Twenty seconds of washing my hands felt like an eternity.

I used to have a goldfish which breakdanced on a floor

But only for like twenty seconds

22 goes by so fast.

Be sure to enjoy your twenty second year.

Man people have really short attention span for Avengers: Endgame

It's a twenty second movie after all.

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There is a woman with no arms and no legs crying on a bench at the local lake.

A man notices everyone just walking by her without stopping and starts to feel bad . He goes up to her sits down and says whats wrong ? "I have never even been hugged" she replied. So the man leans over and embraces her, yet she still crys .

What is bothering you now the man asks, "i have ne...

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A man walks into a bar...

He sits at the bar and orders a shot of whisky. While his drink is being poured, the man spots a jar of ten dollar bills sitting by the peanuts labeled, “bar challenge”.
Curious, the man asked the bartender what was up with that.
“That there is the current jackpot for this months bar challen...

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An old man grabs a seat at the bar...

An old man grabs a seat at the bar and order a double scotch, which the barman promptly serves him. After drinking all his glass in one shot, he asks for another one, which the barman serves him.

The old man then say "How about a little friendly bet my friend?". The barman repond "why not" a...

The Interview

A blonde goes for a job interview in an office. The interviewer decides to start with the basics. 'So, Miss, can you tell us your age, please?'

The blonde counts carefully on her fingers for about 30 seconds before replying, 'Ehhhh .. 22!'

The interviewer tries another straightforward ...

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