This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A very tall man walks into a bar...

and a lady recognizes him as a pro Rugby player. They start to talk and eventually go back to his place.


They start to kiss, and the man takes off his shirt. On his arm, he has a tattoo that says REEBOK.
"What's that for?" the lady questions.
"Oh, I have this so that when I'm ...

A four-foot tall man was fired from his job

...for microaggressions

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man walks into a bar with a tiny piano and a foot tall man playing it.

He sits down and the bartender asks "What's the deal with that?"

The man claims to have found a genie that can grant amazing wishes and that's were he got the little man and the tiny piano. He pulls out a rusty old lamp and hands it to the bartender.

"Give it a try" the man says to the...

A four foot tall man visits the local bordello...

when he gets there. he's immediately greeted with laughter and scorn by the ladies of the night, who giggled and laughed at the very thought of sleeping with him.



Finally, the madam had enough. The man had money, and his money was just as good as anyone else's. So she took him by th...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A tall man walks into a bar, with a tiny man standing on his shoulder.

... and orders a beer. As soon as he sits down at the counter the tiny man hops off his shoulder and starts walking around. It is just a bit taller than a pint of beer, and dressed in a sports jersey. It walks over to the guy right to him, chugs his beer in one go, bumps his fist into the guys shoul...

Be careful what you ask for

A guy walks into a bar, followed by 12 beautiful women. He slams a bag of gold down and says, " Bartender, drinks for everyone".

The bartender just finished setting up drinks for everyone at the bar when suddenly a 12 inch tall man jumped out from the rich guys jacket and runs down the len...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

So a man walks into a bar with a 1-foot-tall well-dressed person behind him

The man pulls an electronic piano out of his pocket and sets it up on the bar, then sets up a tiny little stool. The foot-tall man takes a seat, cracks his knuckles, and begins to tickle the ivories in the most beautiful manner the bartender has ever heard.

As the sweet melodies resounded th...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man walks into a bar with a briefcase

He asks the bartender
“If I showed you the most amazing thing you’ve ever seen would you give me a free drink?”
The bartender replies “yeah, why not, but it has to be pretty amazing.”
The man takes out his briefcase and opens it for the bartender. Inside is a 9 inch tall man with a miniatur...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Story Challenge: My name is Inspector Clouseau...

...and I'm working on a case, because I haven't got a table.

I looked out of the window and saw a very tall man. I knew he was tall - I was on the 6th floor.

There was a tap at the door. "Funny place to put a tap", I thought.

I opened it, and there was a beautiful woman standing...

A man walks into a bar

So a guy walks into a bar one day and he can’t believe his eyes. There, in the corner, there’s this one-foot-tall man, in a little tuxedo, playing a tiny grand piano.
So the guy asks the bartender, “Where’d he come from?”
And the bartender’s, like, “There’s a genie in the men’s room who grants...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man walks into a bar and strolls up to the counter

Without a word he pulls out a miniature piano and a foot tall man from his jacket. The tiny man immediately starts playing a beautiful sonata.

"Thats amazing son. Where in the world did you get him from?", asked the bartender.

The man pulls out a magic lamp and sets it on the counter...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

So a guy is having drinks at a bar .....

After a while he looks over and sees a huge jar stuffed to the brim with 20 dollar bills. He asks the bar tender " hey whats with the jar? Theres gotta be at least 4 grand in there?" to which the bar tender replies " oh, you wouldn't wanna know. Its just a running bet" The guy says " try me. I love ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man walks into a bar and asks for 2 drinks

A guy walks into a bar and says, "Bartender, I'd like two shots of whiskey; one for me and one for my best friend."

The bartender says, "Do you want me to wait until he gets here?"

The guy says, "He's here already," and takes a 6-inch tall man from his pocket and sets him on the bar. <...

Men call short women "petite". What do women call short men?

Um, yeh, they don't call.

Source: I'm not a tall man.

A man walks into a bar

As he walks to the counter, he sees a one foot tall man playing the piano. He comments the player on his skill, and then sits down and orders a beer. The bartender reaches down and hands him an empty bottle.

"What's this?" asks the man. "I asked for a beer." "That's the wishing bottle," the b...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Honorable discharge

Three long-time servicemen are about to retire, and they are told that as a reward for many years of great service, they're are going to be given an amount of money equal to the distance between any two points on their body, in inches, times a thousand.

The colonel, being a tall man, picks t...

The smartest detective in the world was brought in to help solve a terrible crime...

"We have a lot of suspects, sir," said the officer. "Why don't you tell me about them?" asks the detective.

"Well first, we found this guy hiding in the bushes." - "It wasn't Russell," replies the detective.

"How about the wife of this hippie?" - "Mississippi? Not her."

"We got...

So a guy walks into bar and reaches into his pocket...

From his pocket, he produces a very small grand piano. A moment later, he produces a 1ft tall man from his other pocket and places him down next to the piano. The little man immediately sits down and begins to play the piano, and remarkably well at that. The bar patrons are amazed and one of them ap...

Sean Bean is walking down the street

Heard you guys like long OC.

&nbsp;

Sean Bean is walking down the street, enjoying his Sunday night. Suddenly, a black paneled van pulls up next to him. Four massive dudes in ski masks wearing all black leap out and try to grab him. Sean remembers his GoT training and manages to ta...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Postman is waiting in line for the ATM

A postman is waiting in line to use the ATM, a tall man was standing in front of him.

The Postman takes off his glove, presses his index finger in the mans ear and loudly says "BOOP"

The man turns around, stares down the postman, and turns back around.

The postman did it again, ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man walks down a lonely beach

After a while, he sees another man laying on a towel with a lamp on one side of him and a one foot tall man playing the piano on the other side of him.

After exchanging pleasantries, the first man asks "what's that?", pointing to the lamp. "Oh, that?", says the second man. "That's a magic lam...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Three buddies from high school take a trip to Mexico...

Each of the men has spent their lives productively, and are each at the top of their respective fields, and they've kept in touch over the years. They decide that, to celebrate their twentieth high school graduation anniversary, they're going to go down to Mexico City together and generally live it ...

A guy is having a rough day and visits a new pub.

The first thing he notices is a foot-tall man on the counter playing a miniature piano. The bartender asks him for a drink. "I'll take a beer," he replies. "And where did you get the little man and his piano?" The bartender seems upset, "We have a genie in the bathroom who will grant you one wish." ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

If I can show you something you've never seen before, can I have my drinks for free?

...a guy asks the bartender as he sits down. The bartender agrees so the guy reaches in his bag and pulls out miniature piano.

"A miniature piano?" The bartender scoffs. "My kid has one of those."

Then the guy reaches in his bag again and pulls out a one foot tall man. The little man s...

A huge man with really long legs was standing right beside my bed whilst I slept last night, and so I kicked him hard in the shin.

Turns out it wasn't a tall man and my top bunk came crashing down on my face.

12 inch Pianist

One day, a man walks into a bar and sees a 1 foot tall man playing the piano. He asks the bartender how he got the 12 inch pianist. The bartender says, "Oh yeah, there is a genie out back behind the bar!" so the man walks out behind the bar and asks the genie for 1,000,000 bucks. Sure enough, the ge...

A man enters a variety show

With his miniature companion, a small foot tall man and a miniature piano, not more than 20 inches across.

The mini man sits at his mini stool and plays the piano perfectly-- a classic Motzart concerto.

He wins the $5,000 top prize and the emcee asks, "So how did you come across a min...

Retired golf vacation in Hawaii...

A man retires after 35 years at the same job and decides to take his first retirement vacation in Hawaii with his wife. He is really looking forward to two weeks of sightseeing and golf. The day they arrive, he signs up for pro golf lessons at the beautiful Pebble Beach Country Club. After a night o...

A guy walks into a bar...

A man walks into a bar and hears piano music. He looks at the piano and can't see anyone sitting there, so he walks over and discovers a foot-tall man standing on the piano bench playing the tune of Dixie-Girl. The man thought that this was strange so he goes over to the bartender and asks where the...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.