Sales Clerk Jokes

A woman goes into Cabela’s to buy a rod and reel for her grandson’s birthday. She doesn’t know which one to get, so she just grabs one and goes over to the counter.

The clerk was standing behind the counter wearing dark glasses. She says to him, “Excuse me, sir. Can you tell me anything about... read more

"Excuse me, Where are your Polish Sausages?"

The clerk asks "Are you Polish?" The man becomes irate and starts yelling "If I asked where the pasta was would you ask if I was Italian?", "no" replies the clerk. "If I asked where the corned beef was would you ask if I were Irish?" "no" replies ... read more

She spent $5000 and felt really good about the results.

On her way home she stopped at a dress shop to look around.
As she was leaving, she said to the sales clerk, "I hope you don't mind me asking, but how old do you think I am?"

"About 35,"he replied.

"I'm actually 47," t... read more

"I can't see myself wearing these" said the old man.

"Why not?" asked the clerk.

"Because I'm blind".

He found his way to the menswear department where a sales clerk offered to help him.

"Quiero calcetines," said the man.

"I don't speak Spanish, but we have some very nice suits over here," said the sales clerk.

"No, no quiero trajes. Quiero calcetines," said the man.

"Wel... read more

In Moscow, an old grandmother goes to the newspaper store, buys a newspaper, glances at it briefly, and immediately throws it away. The next day, the grandmother goes to the store again, buys a newspaper, looks at it briefly, and immediately throws it away. So it goes day in and day out, one morning... read more

A man walks into a shoe store...

...and tries on a pair of shoes.

\- "How do they feel?" asks the sales clerk.

\- "Well ... they feel a bit tight." replies the man.

The assistant promptly bends down and has a look at the shoes and the mans feet.

\- "Try pulling the... read more

The store manager was giving final instruction to the new sales clerk before sending him out onto the floor for the first time.

Said the manager to the clerk, “The most important thing to remember is that we NEVER tell a customer that we don’t have it. Times are tough, and we can’t afford to ... read more

A small figurine in the window catches his eye. It's a little rabbit with a mallet getting ready to hit some mochi. The man recognises this as the rabbit in the moon from the story and decides he really likes it. He goes inside and asks the sales clerk about the price.

Upon hearing the price,... read more

A blonde girl walks into a store and sees a small TV that she really likes. She asks the sales clerk, "How much for this TV?"

The sales clerk says, "I'm sorry, we don't sell to blondes."

Angry, but determined to buy the TV, the blonde girl storms out and dyes her hair black. She come... read more

A man walked in to a ladies department walked up to the woman behind the counter and said, "I'd like to buy a bra for my wife."

"What type of bra?" asked the clerk.

"Type?" Inquires the man, "There is more than one type?"

"Look around", said the saleslady, as she showed a sea of... read more

Suddenly he stops and starts swinging the dog around by it's leash over his head. A sales clerk runs over and says, "Sir! What on earth are you doing?"

The blind man says, "Oh nothing, just browsing."

“I bought this book last week called The Biggest Cowards in History, but the minute I opened the book, all of the pages fell out.”

The sales clerk looks at the book and explains, “Well, that’s because it’s got no spine.”

Jacqueline was a very attractive woman but she was feeling a little insecure about the wrinkles that began appearing on her face once she turned 40. After trying to deal with the wrinkles using make-up for a few years, she decided to get a facelift on her 43rd birthday. She spent her savings, $10,00... read more