UPJOKE

Have You Ever Thought Jokes

Have you ever thought of putting money into textiles?

I'm a broker at the local clothing bank. I'm mostly a sock broker, but I handle all kinds of vestments. We do a lot of short sales.
(Please be kind, it's my first post!)

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Have you ever thought "I don't want to deal with this shit today"

So you leave without wiping?

Have you ever thought about the word racecar and how it's a palindrome?

Put it backwards and it spells racecar, put it sideways and it kills Paul Walker.

Have you ever thought of any alternative names for hell?

I heaven't.

Doctor: "Have you ever thought of donating organs after your death?"

Man: " Yeah, I will donate my brain"
Doctor: "Good, all tiny bits help"

Have you ever thought of an awesome joke but had to race the final 1% of your battery to post it?

Back when I had an Android I sure did but look at me now, my iPhone still has 27% lef........

A man was on a business trip in Paris

He goes to well known brothel and has the best time of his life. He goes out after, lights a cigarette and after a while he spits on the pavement.
A policeman passing by sees him spitting so he stops and tells him: 'You can't do this here, you are in Paris. I am sorry but you have to pay a 50€ f...

A millionaire....

A Millionaire is on holiday in a poor country. Each day he's sitting on a beach he sees a fisherman go out on his boat for an hour and catch a few fish. After a few days he approaches him and says 'Excluse me, but I couldn't help noticing you each day. Have you ever thought about fishing for longer ...

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