Hanging Up Jokes

I am getting sick and tired of your cold calls.

A woman was in bed having with her husband's friend, when all of a sudden the telephone rings, she answers. After hanging up she says, ''That was Harry, but don't worry, he won't be home for a while. He's playing cards with you.''

She looks up and sees a flock of terns flying nearby. She goes in the kitchen for a coffee and when she comes back out she sees that the terns have flown over and crapped on her laundry. Upset with what has just happened, she takes the laundry down, goes back in the house and washes it again. She c... read more

"Sorry, man", said the Corporal, "the last Jeep went out yesterday to Sgt. Fat- McGinty."

The voice on the phone said, "Do you know who this is?"

"No, man," said the Corporal.

"This is Sgt. McGinty!"

After a moment, the Corporal asked, "Well, do you know who *this* is?... read more

The pills that the doctor gave him was too big to swallow so he asks people how to take it. No one knows so he calls his doctor

"Sir, the pills that you gave me are too big how do I take them?" Then he hangs up the phone and asks the people again

"He said these are suppositories and ha... read more