UPJOKE
clientvoice mail

Facebook Status Jokes

I despise it when a couple has a minor quarrel and the girlfriend updates her Facebook status to "single.”

I mean, I fight with my parents all the time, but I never update my status to "orphan."

Yesterday my brother uploaded a status on Facebook.

He wrote in his facebook status "I love my girlfriend <3"

I knew that he liked them young but this is getting out of hand.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I'm writing a virus that puts your top porn search as your facebook status

It will forever change history.

The Americans are using a new type of rocket that constantly updates its Facebook status until it reaches its target.

It's an attention-seeking missile.

Did you know people are getting paid to mention products in their Facebook statuses?

That’s as crazy as the discounts at Dave’s Furniture Emporium…

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

All the single ladies

I fucking hate it when couples have a little argument and the girlfriend changes her facebook status to 'single'


I mean, I have arguments with my parents all the time and you don't see me changing my status to 'orphan'.

"You've got to let people know where you're going!" said my driving instructor as we merged on to the expressway...

"OK!" I replied as I updated my Facebook status.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Three people having sex is called a threesome...

Two people having sex is called a twosome. Now I know why everyone calls me handsome.

(My brothers Facebook status today...)

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A woman gets off a bus with one boob out of her blouse...

She's updating her Facebook status simultaneously.
After a while a man asks the obvious question pointing at the glaring tit "Ma'am is this some form of treatment for breast cancer?"
The woman in sudden realization yells "Oh my God! my Baby".

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.