My sniper rifle has conjunctivitis cream smeared all round the eyepiece
It’s a sight for sore eyes
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
An old lady walks into a bank with a big bag of money
One of the employees asks her what she wants.
Old Lady: I'm here to open an account and I want to deposit all this money into the bank.
"Whoa, that's a whole lot of money", the employee said. "You'll have to talk to the manager."
The employee escorts her to the manager's office...
A Dad told his fat son he was very good at everything.
Son: Why did you say that dad? Dad: Because you are all rounded.
A kindly old man is walking by the seaside when he sees three lovely young ladies crying their eyes out.
So he says, "Dear me, you poor things, so miserable on such a lovely day as this! Come and have a cup of tea and let's see if we can't make you feel better."
Won over by his twinkly-eyed charm, the three young ladies manage to dry their eyes and they follow him to a chintzy little seaside c...
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