UPJOKE

Adding Up Jokes

Today, I felt like a part of me was missing. Like something isn't adding up..

Then I remember that my doctor has performed biopsy on me this afternoon.

A 50-year-old lawyer who had been practicing law since he was 25 died suddenly in his sleep.

When he gets to the Pearly Gates, the lawyer says, "There must be some mistake. I was 50, that's too young to die."

St. Peter looks in his records and says, "That's odd. By adding up the hours on your billing documents, you should be 83 by now."

Yale educated

The bank manager noticed the new clerk was not good at counting money and adding up figures.


"Where did you get your financial education?" he asked.


"Yale," replied the lad.


"And what's your name?" barked the manager.


"Yim Yohnston," he replied...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man walks into a bar with a donkey and an ostrich.

He sits down at the counter and asks for a beer.

“That will be 5.98$, sir.”, the bartender says.

The man, puts his hand into his pocket and pulls out 5 dollars and 98 cents in exact change.

“How much will it cost to buy everyone here a round of drinks?”, the man asks, taking a s...

I recently had to sell my calculator manufacturing business.

The numbers just weren't adding up.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Sir Arthur and the case of brief case identity

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, creator of the fictional detective Sherlock Holmes, purportedly told of a time when he climbed into a taxi cab in Paris..!
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Before he could utter a word, the driver turned to him and asked,
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"Where can I take you, Mr. Doyle?"

Doyle was flabbergasted.....

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

New CEO at a candy company

A large candy company hires a new CEO. The CEO decides in her first month to review the various aspects of the business in order to look for areas that can be improved.

After several days of looking over various aspects of the business she gets to reviewing the Department of Taste. As she is...

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