UPJOKE

Wrap Around Jokes

Man visits his psychiatrist with Saran Wrap around his legs instead of pants

Doctor says "I can clearly see your nuts"

A person walks into a hospital wearing nothing but plastic wrap around his genitals.

The front desk clerk says "I can clearly see your nuts."

I was having a real hard time finding something warm to wrap around my neck and could have used some help.

It was a scarf issue that I wish you saw.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Bizarre Facts no One Knows

1. Most humans were born on their birthday
2. The distance from the Earth to the Sun is the same exact distance from the Sun to the Earth
3. A normal skeleton has enough bones to make an entire skeleton
4. If you took out all your veins and laid them out end to end, you would die.
5. The...

One day, a blonde was sick and tired of all the blonde jokes and wanted to prove herself

So she began going door to door to see if there was any type of work that she could do.

She arrived at this wealthy family home where she knocked on the door and a man answered. “Hi. I’m tired of being called blonde and being told that I’m dumb. Is there any job that I can do to prove my wor...

A man walks into a psychologist's office...

And he was wearing absolutely nothing but a piece of Saran wrap around his waist. The shrink looks at him and says, "Well, I can clearly see your nuts."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

"Are we alone"

These two little martians land at a closed gas station in a small town in the middle of the night. The two little martians come out of their flying saucer and walk up to the gas pump and say “take me to your leader”. Well of course the gas pump doesn’t say anything and the little martian says it aga...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The aliens!

Two aliens landed in the Arizona desert near an abandoned gas station. They approached the gas pumps and one of them said to it " Greetings, Earthling. We come in peace. Take us to your leader".
The gas pump of course did not respond. The alien repeated the greeting and there was still no respon...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two aliens landed in the New Mexico desert near a gas station that had been closed for the night.

They approached one of the gas pumps and the younger of the two aliens addressed it.

"Greetings, Earthling. We come in peace. Take us to your leader."

The gas pump (of course) didn't respond.

The younger alien started to get mad at the lack of response and the older one said, "I...

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