A Man walks into a bar with a newt on his shoulder. The bartender says “What an interesting pet, whats his name?” “Tiny” the man replies. “What an odd name, why do you call him Tiny?”
"Because…He’s my newt.
Why do you call a pregnant lady “knocked up”?
Because someone came in
I came home with a salamander on my shoulder and my son, all excited, shouted, "What's his name!?” Smiling, I replied, “Tiny!" My kid laughed and asked, “What an odd name, why do you call him Tiny?” I explained...
“Because...he’s my newt!"
Why do you call your dog ”I-know-what-you-did”?
I love how many people jump 3 feet high when I start calling him.
Why do you call when mexican twins fight?
Juan on Juan match
Santa walks into the North Pole bar, takes a seat, and asks the bartender for his most popular shot
Bartender pours out something that looks like candy cane. “It’s called ‘Elf Cum’”.
Santa cringes, but downs it and remarks, “Gee, that’s really good, but why do you call it ‘Elf Cum’?”
Bartender replies, “When I tested it out with Mrs. Claus, she said, ‘That tastes just like ...
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
A man goes to a new store to get some toilet paper
He approaches the clerk and asks are there any brands he recommends.
"Why yes sir! I make all my own products and we've something to suit everybody. This one I call Bob Ross"
"Why have you named it that?"
"Cos it's so gentle your ass will feel so relaxed and nice afterwards sir...
A man is driving down a country road
A man is driving down a country road when he loses control of his car and ends up in a ditch. He gets out of the car and knocks on a farmhouse door for help. He explains his situation to the farmer. The farmer gets his horse and they walk to the crash scene. The farmer then uses rope to tie the hors...
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