UPJOKE

What do you call a well educated farmer?

A farmacist

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a well educated penis

is one that rises so the lady can sit down

What is the most well educated type of nut?

Macademia.

A man went to the doctor...

He said, "Doc, you gotta check my leg. Something's wrong. Just put your ear up to my thigh, you'll hear it!"

The doctor cautiously placed his ear to the man's thigh only to hear, "Gimme 20 bucks, I really need 20 bucks."

"I've never seen or heard anything like this before, how long has...

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Little Johnny #71

During a class on good manners and etiquette being held for young children, the teacher says to her students:

ā€œIf you were courting a well educated young girl from a prominent family and during a dinner for two you needed to go to the toilet, what would you say to her?ā€

Little Mike rep...

Two men are sitting on the train

One is very well educated and sophisticated and the other is a sad, simple minded alcoholic.

As the train journey is extremely long and there is nothing else to do, the well educated man decides to entertain himself by playing a game with the alcoholic.

The well educated man says ā€œLe...

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Reality

Letter from Daughter to Parents

Dear Mother and Dad:

It has now been three months since I left for college. I have been remiss in writing this and I am very sorry for my thoughtlessness in not having written before. I will bring you up to date now, but before you read on,please sit d...

A smart scientist amd a blonde girl sit down on a plane.

A very smart man boards a plane and sits down.
A blond girl sits next to him.

He is bored so he says to her

"Let's play a game, I give you a riddle if you cannot find the answer you pay me 5 dollars. If you answer it though you give me a riddle and I don't answer it I'll give you 30...

A black guy and a ginger get in a fight

The two are fighting with just words at first, but then push comes to shove and the black guy shoves the ginger into the edge of a table. His back snaps and he immediately falls unconscious.

The ginger is taken to hospital in critical condition, but doesn't survive. The locals wish that they...

I work at an unusual restaurant......

The owner is woman name Lily who liked to drink a lot. She had the restaurantā€™s logo, the label from a bottle of vodka, drawn on everything. Chairs, tables, light fixtures, bathroom sinks, etc. They were everywhere! Worse yet, it was done with a #2 pencil. The weird owner would also keep all the lar...

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The genie.

A man and his wife were plying ping pong in their home, when the wife accidentally struck the ball too hard,
and it went into their neighborā€™s open window and there was a sound of breaking glass from inside.


Nobody came out and there was no sign of the neighbor, so the couple thought ...

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