Two cowboys come upon an Indian lying on his stomach with his ear to the ground. One of the cowboys stops and says to the other
"You see that Indian?" "Yeah," says the other cowboy. "Look," says the first one, "he's listening to the ground. He can hear things for miles in any direction." Just then the Indian looks up. "Covered wagon," he says, "about two miles away. Have two horses, one brown, one white. Man, woman, child,...
Two cowboys are sitting in a restaurant when a lady at the next table begins choking on a piece of steak. One of the cowboys jumps up grabs the lady, yanks down her panties, and plants a big wet kiss firmly on her bottom. The startled woman coughs loudly and out flies the piece of steak.
As the cowboy returns to the table, his friend says "I've heard of that 'hind lick' maneuver but I've never seen it performed before."
Did you hear the Cowboys had a touchdown in Philadelphia yesterday?
It was at the airport!
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
It was spring in the old west. The cowboys rode the still snow-choked trails looking for cattle that survived the winter. As one cowboy's horse went around the narrow trail, it came upon a rattlesnake warming itself in the spring sunshine.
The horse reared and the cowboy drew his six-gun to shoot the snake. "Hold on there, partner," said the snake, "don't shoot - I'm an enchanted rattlesnake, and if you don't shoot me, I'll give you any three wishes you want."
The cowboy decided to take a chance. He knew he was safely out of th...
Did you hear about the cowboys who deny robbing the glue factory?
They're sticking to their guns.
A grumpy, drunken, old cowboy was riding his horse near the Mexican border when he noticed it chewing on a strange, stout cactus.
Before long, the pony started behaving strangely, walking slowly and irregularly and not responding to the cowboys commands. The cowboy became progressively more frustrated, as well as more drunk and more mean as he continued to glug himself into the depths of his whiskey bottle. The horse ev...
2 Cowboys are stranded in the desert.
They keep pushing on and on until they see a tree. # This tree in particular looked like a bacon tree. # “We’re saved” exclaimed the cowboys. # They rushed towards the tree and where quickly shot down. # It wasn’t a bacon tree, it was a ham bush. # # I was not aware ...
A joke my friend told me (long)
Two Texans are hanging out in hell. One day, the devil walks up and says, "why are you two not burning?" The Texans reply, "We're from Texas, this feels great." So the devil goes and turns the heat wayyy up. There's no describing this heat. He returns to the Texans to find them still just hanging ou...
Two cowboys are riding along on their horses.
They soon get tired, and are miles away from home after getting lost. They find a near by tree, tie up their horses, and sleep, completely forgetting they have no food and little water.
The next morning they are famished, finally realizing they have no food. On says to the other, “We can kill...
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
A new law is passed in the wild west, which states: “For every Indian scalp one shall receive $10 as a reward.” Two cowboys agree to go bounty hunting the next day.
They set out early in the morning but spend the whole day without any luck. Finally, tired and exhausted, the two cowboys wander upon a lone Indian, obviously lost from his tribe.
Out of desperation they catch him, cut off his scalp, throw it in a bag and leave the body lying there.
Two cowboys are riding out when the spot an Indian laying down with his ear to the ground.
Approaching him, one Cowboy says “Look here. These Indians can track wagons from miles away. You there, what can you tell about the closest wagon train?”
The Indian says “Large Conestoga wagon, father, mother, three daughters, headed due west at around ten miles per hour”.
A Cowboy is looking in the market for a new horse...
He walks in to town and sees on a churches sign horse for free come inside and ask the pastor.
The Cowboy walks and talkes to the pastor:
Cowboy: So... I hear you have a horse for free?
Pastor: I sure do, but you have to know that this horse is special. It will only move forward...
Two cowboys were riding their horses along the fence line...
One of the cowboys was from Texas and the other one was from San Francisco.
They're riding along and all of a sudden they see a sheep with its head stuck in the fence.
The Texas cowboy yells, "Yeehaw, look what we found. This is going to be good!" He jumps off his horse and goes over...