UPJOKE

Soft As Jokes

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A Man Accidentally Elbows a Woman's Boob

as she is standing behind him in a hotel lobby. The man apologizes profusely and says "if your heart is as soft as your breasts, I know you'll forgive me."

To which the woman replied "if your dick is as hard as your elbow, I'm in room 318."

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a man gets on a crowded hotel elevator

In doing so he accidently elbows a woman in the breast. He pauses and whispers "Ma'am I apologize but if your heart is soft as your breast you'll forgive me" She responds "Of course you are forgiven, and if your dick get's as firm as your elbow, I'm in room 1145"

Baby skin isn't as soft as they say it is.

Or maybe my rug is fake...



(Repost but haven't seen it in awhile!)

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Stranger guy with a sexy women in a hotel lobby.

A man is in a hotel lobby. He wants to ask the clerk a question. As he turns to go to the front desk, he accidentally bumps into a woman beside him and as he does, his elbow goes into her breast. They are both quite startled. The man turns to her and says, "Ma'am, if your heart is as soft as your br...

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So I was walking downstairs from my apartment and my elbow hit the chest of a girl whom I had never seen.

"Ma'am, if your heart is as soft as your chest then you will forgive me", I said to her.

"If your dick is as hard as your elbow, I live on the 4th floor", she replied.

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I was on a train, about to get of..

So I stood there at the door as the train slows down and I wanted to adjust my backpack..
But when I did, I bumped my elbow against something soft behind me.
I looked behind me, and there was this beautiful lady with the biggest bust I’ve ever seen, and apparently bumped my elbow against.
I...

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A farmer selling his peaches

A farmer knocks on the door and an attractive woman answers the door in skimpy lingerie.
"Hello Ma'am, would you like to buy some peaches?"

As she leans on the door frame she asks; "are they as soft as these?" while she touches her breasts. "Or are they as round as this?" as she touches h...

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The Businessman

A travelling businessman gets in the elevator at his hotel after a long day in conferences.

To his weary dismay, each floor up the elevator gets more and more crowded.

On the 4th floor a large group enters, including a very busty woman.

Exhausted, but trying to accommodate, the...

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Thrusting

A man is waiting at the reception of a hotel. As he was just about to ask a question he accidentally thrust his elbow between the bosom of a woman standing behind him. He turns around and says 'Miss, if your heart is as soft as your breasts you will probably forgive me', to which the woman responds:...

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Hotel Vending Machine

One time I was in a hotel and I was trying to get something out of one of those vending machines where you pull the rod corresponding to your selection. It was stuck so I was pulling and pulling and pulling when my hand slipped off the knob. A very buxom young lady was walking past and my elbow acci...

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A man walks into a hotel...

A man walks into a hotel lobby and waits to check in. As he reaches for his wallet at the counter his elbow pushes into the breast of the lady behind him. He is embarrassed and apologizes saying " I am so sorry and if your heart is as soft as your breast you can forgive me"

She looks at him a...

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A business man runs into an elevator at his hotel as the doors are closing

Sidewise slipping in as the doors close, And knocks an attractive business woman in her breast with his elbow. He blushes a bit and says "I'm sorry ma'am, but if your heart is half as soft as your breast you'll forgive me."

The woman does a twice over of the man, reaches into her purse and sl...

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