UPJOKE

So Good Jokes

Why are trans women so good at swimming?

Because they are boyn’t

Why are monks so good at protesting?

The more ohms you have, the greater the resistance.

Why is Spider-Man so good at comebacks?

Because with great power comes great response ability.

I've finally worked out why Spain is so good at football.

Nobody expects the Spanish in position.

If the USA so good

Why did they make the USB?

Why are Americans so good at shooting?

We have the best schools for it

Why is Voldemort so good with computers?

He's fluent in Python

Why are the Italians so good at football?

Because it involves changing sides halfway through.

Why are Scandinavians so good at swimming?

Cause they have Finns

Why are priests from Finland so good at Mortal Kombat?

They're especially well-versed in Finnish hymns.

If badminton is so good

Think about good minton. Lol. Sorry.

Why are Canadians so good at sports?

They always bring their eh game

Why are Chinese kids so good at math?

Because their dog doesn’t eat their homework

I‘m so good with managing money

I got a letter from a debt collector saying ‘outstanding payment’

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why are black people so good at basketball?

because they practice

Why ate pessimists so good at developing photos

Because they always focus on negatives

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why are retired Nazis so good with animals?

They're veteran Aryans.

Why is North Korea so good at geometry?

Because they have a supreme ruler!

People often ask why I’m so good at Dad jokes and it’s simple.

I take an ordinarily terrible pun and take it even father.

Why do yards on the internet look so good?

Because they modem.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why are Chinese speaking people so good at cunnilingus?

Well, you remember that trick where you trace the alphabet with your tongue.

Why was the baker so good with their finances?

They had a lot of practice working with dough.

What makes cows so good?

They are outstanding in their field.

How does Barbie look so good despite being 63?

Plastic Surgery

Told a joke that was so good at work the other day.

So good in fact, that HR wanted to hear it.

Why are North Korean Figure Skaters so good?

It's all about the Execution

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Why are gentle men so good in bed?

Because ladies come first.

I'm so good at sleeping

I can do it with my eyes closed.

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My wife is so good at multi-tasking.

She can have sex and fall asleep at the same time.

Why are mountains so good at listening?

Because of all the Mountaineers!

Why are racists so good at solving rubik's cubes?

Cuz they looooove seperating colors.

Why are Americans so Good at Solving Rubix Cubes?

Because they have a long history of separating colors…

Why are a communist’s jokes so good?

EVERYONE gets them.

Why are dwarfs so good at math?

Because it's the little things that count.

Why are German cars so good?

Because they know how bad the trains are.

Children Jokes are so good!

They never get old.

why are racists so good at doing laundry?

They always separate the whites with the colors

I'm so good at being interrogated.

I can do it blindfolded with my hands tied behind my back.

Why are british people so good at chess?

Their queen never dies.

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Why are Golfers so good at sex?

They’re great at foreplay.

Why are farmers so good at drawing circles?

Because the are Protractors

Why do angels smell so good?

Because their scent from God.

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Why are creative character writers so good in bed?

……because they really know how to pen a trait!

With the current international situation, you'd think that the Russian Tea Rooms in New York would be experiencing a downturn in business. Quite the contrary, business is so good, they've expanded...

...into the Ukrainian Village Restaurant on 2nd Ave.

Q: why are reptiles so good at playing the piano??

A: because they really know their scales!!

How did the people of India get so good at medicine?

They've got much practice thanks to a lot of Sikh people

Why are musicians so good with electricity?

They are always near conductors!

Why are Poets Who Write Idylls So Good?

They have to be well-versed in their field.

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e: "Why did you marry me?" My wife: "Because you are so funny". Me: "I thought it was because I am so good in bed"

My Wife: "You see? You are hilarious"

If vegetables are so good on their own

Why do vegans keep trying to make them taste like meat?

Why is Bruce Lee so good at telling jokes?

Because if his punch line doesn't work, you still get a kick out of it.

Why are sloths so good at giving handjobs?

They aren't in a hurry.

Why are artists so good at self control?

Because they always know where to draw the line.

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Why are accountants so good in bed?

They excel at making spreadsheets

Why are Muslims so good at dating?

Because they always go out with a bang!

Trumps so good at making jobs

He even opened some up in Iran!

Why are geologists so good at getting laid?

They know the best dating techniques.

Why are Egyptians so good at farting?

They have good Sphinxters

I wasn’t feeling so good and so I went to the doctors

I told the doctor that I haven’t been feeling so well lately.

The doctor proceeded to ask me questions and do some tests.

He came to the conclusion that I was not getting enough exercise and therefore advised me to do so.

So, based on the doctors advice, for the next month, i...

Why was everyone in the Soviet Union so good at driving manual?

Because they were afraid of Stalin.

Why are bees so good at job interviews?

Because they know all of the buzzzzzzzz-words!

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Why is a terrorist so good at sex?

Because he trains himself to blow things

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Why was the diamond so good at sex?

Coz diamonds last forever

Why was Neo's mom so good at math?

Because when she was pregnant, she carried the one.

Why are “Dad Jokes” so good?

Because the punchline is apparent.

My dad was so good at Russian roulette.

He only lost once

Im so good at moonwalking,

that i could do it backwards.

My new hearing aids are so good, they're restored my hearing fully

- That's awesome, how long have you had them?
- About 200$

Why does the EU look so good?

She’s lost a pound

Why was the astronomer so good at finding new planets?

He was out standing in his field

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

"You aren't so good in bed either!"

“A doctor and his wife were having a big argument at breakfast. He shouted at her, "You aren't so good in bed either!" then stormed off to work. By mid-morning, he decided he'd better make amends and called home. "What took you so long to answer?" he asked. "I was in bed," she replied. "What were yo...

Why are Executioners so good at their jobs?

Because they execute it perfectly

Why was the mermaid so good at math?

Because she wore an algae-bra.

Why do girl scout cookies taste so good?

child labor

Why does Angus beef taste so good?

Because it has a lot of yummy coweries in it!

China's so good at censorship

They gave themselves 5 stars.

What’s so good about an Ethiopian blow-job?

You know she'll swallow.

Why are Mercedes so good at turning?

Because it benz

What makes Trump so good at magic?

Slight of hand

Trump is so good at creating jobs

He’s even creating daycare jobs down at the border

Why was Jesus so good at twerking?

He always turned the other cheek

Q: Why is the number 40 so good at everything?

A: It’s because it XLs.

Why is Reddit so good for the earth?

Because we recycle everything.

Why are Australians so good at chess?

Because they always leave you with the check, mate

I'm so good at karaoke.

I was blaring out my song the other night, and everyone left the pub to tell their friends about how good I was.

Why is Batman so good at hitting home runs?

He has a batting cage.

Why are paperweights so good at time management?

They are always on top of things.

What’s so good about Switzerland?

I don’t know but the flag is a huge plus.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

You know why are ogres so good in bed?

They don’t stop coming.

Why is Kevin Spacey so good at writing sad songs

Because he’s great at fingering minors

Why are dragons so good at rapping?

Because they're always spitting fire.

Why was the youtuber so good at handling cows?

Because he was used to milking content.

You know what's so good about ethiopian food?

No one who ever ate it has complained about it.

Why are women so good at being Archaeologists?

Because women love digging up the past.

Mr. Stark, I'm not feeling so good...

Rene Descartes get home from work.

Wife: You forgot groceries again!?

Descartes: I'm sorry honey, I wasn't thinking.

*Descartes slowly fades from existence*

Why Germans are so good at car engine manufacturing?

Because they have a lot of experience on combustion chambers

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