During rainy days, I and my lazy dog are competing who sleeps the deepest and the longest.
I am the underdog in this fight.
There’s a technical term for a sunny, warm day which follows two rainy days.
Monday
Why do kangaroos hate rainy days?
Because the kids have to play inside.
A man's diary entry during rainy days... [crosspost from r/funny]
Dear diary,
It's been raining for two weeks straight now. My wife is looking through the window with great longing and sadness in her eyes. If it keeps raining for another two or three days, I'm afraid I'm going to have to let her get into the house.
Two elderly widows, Dolores and Mary, met at a restaurant after a heavy rain.
Both were smokers, but they arrived drenched from head to toe. Dolores noticed that Mary’s cigarette was still dry because it had a covering. Dolores said "Mary, what's that on your cigarette?" Mary responded "It's a condom. I buy them at the drugstore to keep my cigarettes dry on rainy days." D...
Rock and Roll Joke
Kurt Cobain dies and when he opens his eyes, he's in a big practice hall. Looking around he sees Cliff Burton tuning up, Jimi Hendrix and John Lennon warming up on microphones and adjusting their guitar straps to fit, and Jerry Garcia messing with his pedal steel guitar. Kurt ambles over to Jerry...
My boss has some winners, but I always get a chuckle from this one. (Pretty Long)
A man and his dog walk into a bar, the man sits down, and his dog follows in suit. The bartender asks, "What can I get you?" The man orders a shot of whiskey and drinks it as soon as the glass hits the bar. "That'll be $3.50." the bartender says promptly. "What if I told you that my dog is able to t...
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