Pew Pew Jokes - 17 Hilarious Pew Pew Jokes

Giles was late for shooting practice so the Sergeant made him pretend he was holding a pistol and make "Pew pew" sounds.

Giles didn't want to make a fuss so he makes his hands into a pistol and starts saying "pew pew" while aiming.

But the idiot Giles was almost always late. So a lot of "pew pewing" was going on when he was practicing.

After 4 months, there's been an invasion and a full-blown war has s...

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I want a gun that shoots wooden benches.

I'd walk into a church with no seating and be like: *pew pew pew. pew pew. pew pew pew*

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My local church went bankrupt and someone turned it into a gun range.

The community didn't like it, but it already had pew pew pews.

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What sounds do lasers make in a church?

Pew pew pew!

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My six year old son told me a joke at dinner tonight and I absolutely loved it.

Son: "Knock, knock"

Me: "Who's there?"

Son: "A chicken"

Me: " "A chicken who?"

Son *interrupting*: "Pew pew pew pew pew!"

Me: .................?

Him: "Get it?! Like it's shooting eggs at you!"

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If the 2nd Amendment were a religion, what kind of chairs would their churches have?

Pew pews.

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Skunked

A friend of mine got sprayed by a skunk at work today, saying it looked like a baby skunk. And my reply to her was:

Baby skunk pew pew pew pew pew pew

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What do you get when you put nutella on salmon?

You get salmonella.

Hahahaha...pew pew pew...haha...*begins sobbing*

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How does a church congregation defend against an attack by Galactic Imperial Stormtroopers?

They use the pew, pew-pew pews.

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What's the difference between a church and a mosque?

In a church you see pew, pew pew.

In a mosque you hear pew pew pew.

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What sound did the gun make when the priest shot through two benches to kill a mass shooter?

PEW PEW

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A man whispered something in his friend's ear, making him fall dead on the ground. What did he say?

Pew pew pew...

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Where will everyone be sitting at Carrie Fisher's funeral

Pew Pew Pew

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Little known fact: Most Star Wars' space fights filmed in a church

Pew Pew Pew

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What does it sound like when two churches fight?

Pew Pew PEWPEWPEW!!!

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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

i wanna fingerbang bill oreilly

... thats it. i just wanna finger bang him

#bang bang
#pew pew

What sound does a gun made from church seating make?

Pew Pew..

Sorry. Just became a father 2 years ago. I have some catching up to do.

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