Biggest Pee Pee

There were three boys all in third grade: an Asian boy, a Spanish boy and a redneck. They were trying to think of games to play at recess when the Asian boy got an idea. "I know," he said, "we can play 'Who's Got the Biggest Pee Pee'".

"How do you play that?" asked the redneck.

"It'...

At a bus stop near the center of town

An elderly woman gets on the bus and takes a seat behind two old Italian friends engaged in conversation.

"How was your night last night, Tony?"

"Ah Giuseppe, it was a a-wonderful night-a a last-a night-a."

" You see, Emma a-come first, then I come a-next. Then our two asses a...

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What does a party with R. Kelly and Michael Jackson always have?

Hee hee and Pee pee.

You sick fucks.

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My 5 year old son wouldnt eat his vegetables... NSFW

No matter what I tried he refused. One day it's time for his bath and he doesnt want to.

I ask him what I can do to make him take a bath and he says

"Take it with me."

I say "fuck it. I need a shower too".

We're in the middle of the shower when I notice he's staring at my...

A middle aged guy and his teenage daughter were riding a motor bike

and taking a shortcut through a darkened park when they were stopped by a gang of muggers. They searched them and took the guys wallet, his watch and the motorbike but couldn’t find any jewelry from the girl.When the muggers had gone, the guy asked his daughter; “Did they take your new diamond ring ...

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A man walks into the doctor's with an awful rash on his penis

The doctor asks if the man had been overseas recently, to which the answer was yes (he had just returned from a holiday in Asia).

The Doctor says "I'm sorry to tell you that you have Hong Kong Dong and your penis needs to be removed."

The man was shocked and extremely upset.
He left...

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Little Johnny is sitting in the back of anatomy class.

The teacher is pointing at a map of the body and telling the kids about what each part of the body does. She points at the penis on the diagram and says, "This is the penis. Every boy has one penis and it is for--"

"Hey, teacher," Little Johnny interrupts, "that's not right. My daddy has two ...

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Two girls and a boy are playing doctors and nurses behind the shed one day.

The little boy suddenly drops his pants and shows them his penis. One girl screams and runs away, the other rolls her eyes and proudly scoffs, "Pfft, that's nothing. My daddy's got two of those." "What?!" says the boy, "Two?!" "Yeah two," replies the girl, "One for going pee pee and another for clea...

An old lady gets on a bus

She sits across from these two foreign guys who are deep in conversation. She can't help but overhear one of them saying -

"Emma come first. Then I come. A-two asses, they come together. Then I come again. Two asses, then I pee pee. Then I come again."

The old lady is horrified, and sa...

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A fellow is standing at a urinal, doing his business.

A second person enters the mens room and quickly approaches the urinal next to him, then proceeds to just stand there. The fellow casts a glance sideways to see what is going on.

He sees a young man with no arms standing and looking forlornly at the urinal. His little arm nubs stick out of hi...

Two Italian men get on a bus...

A bus stops and two Italian men get on. They sit down and engage in an animated conversation.

The stern looking older lady sitting behind them ignores them at first, but her attention is galvanized when she hears one of the men say the following:

"Emma comma first. I comma next. Assa ...

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