UPJOKE
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I'm not passive aggressive.

Unlike *some* people.

The first rule of passive aggressive club is...

You know what, nevermind. It’s fine.

The best method of passive aggressiveness is simply to include the person's name at the end of your sentence,

Kathy.

What type of knots does the passive aggressive Archer tie?

Crossbows

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What makes pooping in someone’s yard not passive aggressive?

Eye contact.

Sure passive income is great, but do you know how much you can make with passive aggressive income?

You know what, never mind. Forget I even mentioned it…

What did the passive aggressive cheese say?

Queso? (K......so?)

What did one passive aggressive republican say to the passive aggressive democrat?

I don't know, let me go check my Facebook feed.

Someone once told me that I'm passive aggressive all the time

I told him to please move on in life.

What do you call a Passive Aggressive Ogre with one eye?

A Sighcylops.

I'm a passive aggressive driver.

I pass other drivers and then aggressively speed towards the next one.

How many passive aggressive people does it take to change a lightbulb?

I don't know. Why don't *you* change it yourself instead of waiting for other people to do it?

My wife and I are playing the passive aggressive thermostat game...

She is currently winning 73 to 68

1 in 3 homicides start with a passive aggressive note.

But of course you are too busy to read it.

What did the passive aggressive raven say to Edgar Allen Poe?

"...ugh nevermind"

If someone does something to annoy you, DONT just be passive aggressive about.

Unlike SOME people I know.

There's a group of passive aggressive people that keep saying I'm a snoopy mailman

I know because they keep writing letters about it to their friends.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Unbeknownst to his wife, Steve has secretly been drinking at the bar all day.

He looks at his phone only to realize that its 2a.m. and he should be getting home before his wife is pissed.

He tries to stand up but falls flat on his face. Deciding he needs to sober up, he gets some water and waits an hour. Again, he tries to stand up. Again, he falls flat on his face....

What do you call investing your partners paycheck into a crypto currency they don't like?

Passive aggressive income

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Wifi

A man hears his neighbors having sex very night, so In a fit of passive aggressiveness, he changes the name of his wifi network to "Icanhearyouhavingsex".

The next day when he goes to sign on to his wifi, he sees another network labeled "Wecanhearyounothavingsex"

"My boyfriend was slept with by you!" I heard one girl shout at another in the mall.

"Your reputation will be ruined by this! YOU'RE GONNA BE KILLED BY ME!!"

"Why is she talking like that?" I asked my friend.

"Oh, don't mind her," he said. "She's just really passive aggressive."

The love story of 6 and 9

Sit children, and let me tell you the tale of a guy who was caught in a predicament.

One day a guy was mowing his lawn. He was about a 6, so let's call him that. 6 was mowing his lawn until a dog came running down the street. 6 chased the dog until he caught him. He turned around and saw that...

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