UPJOKE

Parked Car Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Damn girl are you a parked car?

Because I would have to be drunk as fuck to hit that

Hey girl, are you a parked car in July?

Because I want to leave a baby in you.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

There was a man and a woman in a parked car at a drive in movie.

They were having sex in the back-seat of a small sports car when the man suddenly slipped a disk in his back! He was stuck, he couldn't move at all and neither could his girlfriend, she was pinned nude beneath her 250 pound lover. They were desperate to get out so she managed to reach over the front...

What happened to the frog's illegally parked car?

It got toad away

A man walks his dog late at night when he observes an obviously drunk guy. The guy stops at a parked car, swipes across the car's roof with his arm and says "Nope."

He stumbles over to the next car, again swipes across the roof with his arm and again: "Nope."

This goes on for a while until finally the dog owner decides to ask the man what he was doing.

Drunkard: "I'm searching my car!"

Dog owner: "But you can't find your car by swiping your...

I was travelling on the West Coast when I saw a bumper sticker on a parked car that said: "I miss Detroit"

...so I broke a window, stole the radio, and left a note that said, "Hope this helps."

LPT: If you crash into a parked car and don't have a paper and pen..

simply use a key to scratch your insurance details on to the bonnet.

Did you hear about the illusionist who drove home drunk after a show?

He turned into a parked car.

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