UPJOKE

Over Fifty Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The husband leans over and asks his wife "Do you remember the first time we had sex together over fifty years ago?

We went behind the village tavern where you leaned against the back fence and I made love to you."

Yes, she says, "I remember it well."

OK, he says, "How about taking a stroll around there again and we can do it for old time's sake?"

"Oh Jim, you old devil, that sounds like a cr...

You know, if I had a dollar for every time someone over fifty told me my generation sucks...

Then I would be able to afford a house in the economy they ruined.

"You don't look a day over fifty!" I told the mother-in-law on her birthday.

Slightly ruined her 38th.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A widow places an add in the classifieds...

Looking for a new partner. Since at her age she wasn't looking for a young fool, she figured she'd add a few specifications.

1. Must be over 50.

2. Must be wealthy enough to take care of me for the rest of my life.

3. Must be very talented in bed.

With that done, she ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Turkey Dinner Surprise

A husband and his wife had been married for over fifty years. They were desperately in love with each other. Neither one had any complaints about the other, except for one. Each morning, the husband would roll over and fart loudly as he woke up. The wife would exclaim, "One of these days you're ...

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