UPJOKE

Oldest Child Jokes

Colonel Sanders was on his deathbed and all his family were sitting around his bed.

“You must tell us the secret ingredient so we can continue to sell your fried chicken” said his oldest child.

The Colonel barely able to move , beckoned his oldest child to him , “come…” he whispered before suddenly dying.

And they haven’t changed the recipe since.

Sorry, I mad...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A widowed mother of 3 is worried her children aren’t getting enough iron in their diet.

Not sure what to do, she mixes bb’s into their oatmeal. Later that day the first child comes running in the kitchen:

“Mama Mama - Guess what!?! I peed a bb!!”

“Oh, that’s good,” the mother assured, “that means you’re getting your iron.” And she gave the little tyke a cookie and sent ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Where does my name come from?

A woman was making dinner for her family when her oldest child walked in and asked, "Mom, why did you name me Feather?" "Well," said the mom, "When your father and I carried you out the hospital doors, a feather fell out of the sky and landed on your little head, and it was the most beautiful thing ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My Filipino Friend

My Filipino friend Jhun, had a lot of weird stories this week.

He said his neighbour keeps leaving their small female child on his lawn..
He is somehow paying for his Health Care providers wedding?
And His oldest child told him his penis isnt working anymore.

Nevermind.. Appar...

A mother of 3 children was at the park one day...

Her oldest child came up to her on the bench.
"Mama, why is my name Rose?"
"Because when you were born, a rose petal fell onto your head, and we read it as a sign to name you Rose."
The mother's second child came running up and asked:
"Mama why is my name Lily?"
"Because at the hospit...

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